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I was given a list of things to bring to the hotel room: a spatula, my favorite flogger, red ribbon, and a ruler. Those were the only clues I was provided. I did as asked and packed these things in my overnight bag. After checking into the room and getting dressed, we headed to a masquerade ball. I wore a ballgown and they wore tuxes. We all wore beautiful masks that covered just our eyes. The ball was fun lots of good drinks and laughs, meeting new people, visiting with old friends, dancing. Nothing happened to tip me off on what to expect later that evening, and I was driving myself nuts trying to guess. The only remotely sexual thing that happened was that Repeat asked me to go to the restroom, take my panties off, and slip them into Rocker's pocket before midnight. The look on his face was priceless when I did so. The ball ended shortly after midnight, and we went back to the hotel. I was immediately told to undress, but to leave on my heels, thigh-high stockings, and mask. They stripped down, but left on their masks as well. In a flurry, I was bent over the dresser and told to brace myself. I felt the sting of my flogger hitting my ass. It was a delicious pain, one that instantly made me want more. I announced this, and was met with chuckling. "Silly girl," Rocker said. "You get what we give you. No more flogging for you." Repeat told me to brace myself again, and I felt a much different sting. It was the spatula, and damned if I hadn't bought what must've been the hardest and strongest one in the world. That red KitchenAid torture tool was tearing my ass up. I knew I'd have bruises, but I did a good job and took my spanking with no arguments. sex maybe friendship but no more
Hi Firstly stop beating yourself up. Who are you in the inside? If you like that person than half the battle is won. I'm bi and was married for over 20 years. My husband loved hearing about my fantasies of other women and encouraged me to explore that side of myself. I did it alone and we played together some too. (this aspect of our lives had nothing to do with our divorce our sex life was actually one of the best parts of our marriage lol). And don't blame your weight on not being with a woman. I'm in a committed relationship with a woman now (going on years she's a lesbian and I'm bi) and she's very overweight. That's one great thing about women we really do care about what's going on inside (in my experience). There obviously has to be a sexual attraction but we're smart enough to know that having all the right parts and knowing how to use them is the really important thing. Sexy comes from within your attitude, your demeanor, your eyes, what you say, how you say it. Give yourself a break but be realistic. A new is a huge life-changing thing. My advice is to have a chat with your husband. If the is there, as you say, it should be easy to have a sit down with him and let him know how you're feeling. Getting on the same is paramount after that you can decide what direction to go. But remember no lying, no cheating that'll only cause huge problems. Good luck. looking for someone to go bar hopping withit and succeeded. What didn't work trying to take the full load on. Feeling like it was my obligation above myself and what I needed. Buckling down and being the 'good -' wore me down, my business suffered greatly and never recovered, marriage started it's downhill slide. What worked realizing after losing what I thought mattered that I needed to have been a priority in it. That it's OK to say I need help in managing this, to take not only myself but my wife out. That no matter what, this event or series of events is just something that's happening in life it is not my life..if that makes any sense. Mom can help get a care giver if she has the funds, you give what care you can handle. Your friend well you might have to take a lesser role in being there due to your own life. A little less contact and you could probably offer better quality support anyway. Combat this from different angles, how do you reduce your stress as well as handle the stress that just be there. Every day I remind myself that the things I do are by my own chosing, I am not trapped by circumstance. That and doing something that shuts the from thinking about it be it shooting like seattle does, bike riding or planning a trip to Fresno..find it and do it. Think positive, kind of unnecessary/optional and enjoyable something you would normally want to do if you could. Maybe ninja stars at a poster of the husband with bonus points for eyes and crotch. amature encounters
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