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Respect tempers honesty and values not only the truth in what is said but the truth in how it's taken; and it NEVER uses honesty as a weapon. My husband and I DO insist on strict honesty in our relationship, there are sometimes when he come to me and says "we need to talk" and I know I am not going to like what I hear, but if it is said with the motivation to help the relationship and in a way that makes clear that the other person is valued,then it is taken well and helps strengthen us. An example was here today on this forum, with a complaining about how is wife ate. He was honest, but not respectful, in fact I believe he ed his wife a cow. That's not going to do anything but poison a relationship and cause a person to prefer lies to the truth. My husband actually has the same complaint about me, I breathe through my mouth due to sinus trouble and sometimes eat noisily because of it. But the way he voiced it made a huge difference, something a the lines of " I know it's small, but it bothers me, could you try to pay more attention to it in the future?" Stating the complaint respectfully AND honestly gives us the ability to keep the air clear and not allow little things to build into resentment, and at the same time keep our emotions unbruised. wife Kirkcudbright mature swinger sex
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