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'Twas, the night before Christmas, and all through the house. Not a creature was stirring, except for my mouse. No lived with me, so I thought I would chatter. There'd be no damn reindeer, and no stupid clatter. There'd be no fat elf, coming through my chimney. I'll be alone, my computer and me. I won't race to the window, to him arrive. I'll just sit right here .. with windows ninety. There's no one I know, as I'm surfing around. None of my regular buddies are found. I went in some chat rooms, but quickly got out. Age, sex, location is all that's about. As, I was about to go check out the net. I got an E-mail which I didn't expect. A told me, she had read my profile. And, ask, if I might like to chat for a while. She said, if I didn't, then she would just leave. But, she was so lonely, on this Christmas. She said, it's the first time, she'd ever been on. But, she heard, computers, could be so much fun. She said, the computer, was usually locked tight. But, she said, her husband, left it on tonight. He's away on some business; He'll be gone all night. So, she thought she'd use it, "I guess it's all right." She started to tell me, about her whole life. How, she was expected to be a good wife. She talked of her anger, frustrations, and needs. Because, she was forced, to do such silly deeds. She talked on and on, from one thing to the next. Then finally told me she was overs*xed. She didn't have s*x, with her husband, she told. He's always too busy, and getting too old. Then, she wrote me something, that made my heart vex. She asked me to teach her, to have cyber-s*x. I said, if she wanted me to, that I could. Then after an hour, she got really good. After hours, my fingers were sore. I told her, that I couldn't go anymore. She said, that was fine, because she was tired too. And anyway, her husband, would be due. She said she would be on, the same time next year. Then asked, if I wouldn't mind, meeting her here. She said, only . on this night, she could be found. It is only . this night, her husband leaves town. She said bye, and signed off ..and I had to pause. I think I just cybered ..with Mrs. Claus! older sex Alamosalies. I've dealt with jerks. I've dealt with jerks telling lies. I've faced the cold, hard truth that I suck in so ways. I know that I've focused a lot of my sadness/anger onto one very finite point that is going to end. It wasn't supposed to. Here's the shit of it: I can't stop crying. I can't seem to talk myself into accepting what is going to happen. I am pissed and devastated and heart-broken all at the same time. Again. The sadness is overwhelming and worse now than when I was in the death throes of divorce. I can't understand why. Anyone have any ideas about how to get through a huge loss right after the huge loss of my family? women seeking marriage
mwm looking for hot mature nsa playmate I would like to apologize for losing my temper. I am by no means perfect, not even close, but my anger is the only thing I am truly ashamed of. I am embarrassed and very sorry that I have let you it now several times. Bean, I am sorry. It is true you often irk me it's out there now and I can't take it back but it's not because I dislike you, nor are you a bitch. It is because of what I as your unbridled and misplaced optimism. That I find this irksome says worse things about me than you. But I always come away from our discussions with a much richer understanding of the issue and my own position, and that is very valuable to me. Cooking Butch, thank you. Everything you said I already knew, but you reminded me when I needed it. Ulula, the Met sounds fabulous. To all who e-mailed, whether to offer support or take me to task, I appreciate it. You are all fantastic, and I would like to stay a part of the forum if you'll have me. But the downside is I don't think I can do it without 2 ground rules. If you find them worthwhile, I look forward to jumping back in. If you do not approve of them or think I am a jackass for even suggesting such a thing, I understand and regret that I not be able to participate for a while because of my own shortcomings. First, I propose that people should read posts thoroughly before commenting, as well as preceding posts. I know this seems easy, but I think that people are prone to read things with preconceived notions and we let our minds sort of get ahead of our eyes. So sometimes we important things because we already think we know where they're going. Secondly, it is never appropriate to belittle or act condescendingly to other members, nor to jump in when someone has done so and back them up. Name ing, ing a person a liar without providing supporting evidence, or simply dismissing a conversation without giving a reason are all highly disrespectful. Please know this rule be a struggle for me more than you, but that is why I ask it of you. If others honor this rule, it helps me do so, as well. When others do not honor it, it is agonizingly hard for me to, although I still try. I apologize for not always getting it right, especially since, when I fail, I do so quite spectacularly. Thanks for sticking with me this far. horny dates Lebeau Louisiana fl
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