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just how much responsibility one's spouse has for meeting one's social/emotional needs. There's no hard and fast rule. Except, I would say, that every person should strive to have at least a handful (3 or 4 or 5) of close friends, activity partners, and confidantes, including one's spouse. (People you used to be close to, but who are now too busy or have otherwise drifted away, don't count.) Maybe consider who in your life you could give more of yourself to and in return receive the heartfelt companionship you're missing. And/or branch out and meet some new prospects. And again, I think the big picture is important. Even if your husband and this continue like a house on fire for the next two or years, still that's just a blip in the scheme of your marriage. looking for an assertive friendYou're right, if your puppy is chewing on (insert unacceptable here) then it is likely for attention. At present, if he chews on acceptable objects you ignore him, if he chews on your favorite book you focus a LOT of attention on him (directly by taking the item away, indirectly by observing him more closely for a while). To turn this around, you would need to alter your own behavior and do this exercise at least once per day for a while: -Set aside at least a half hour for this and grab some tasty bite-size treats. -Place an unacceptable somewhere he has to work to get to and a acceptable close to it but easier to get to (. the cardboard on the coffee table and his toy on the floor near it.) Sit nearby, preferably in between the two objects. -When he moves toward the unacceptable turn and face away but keep him within your peripheral vision. He should notice your change in body language, cross your arms if you need to. Act as if you are ignoring him if he moves to the unacceptable, praise when he moves to the toy. -If he continues to go after the unacceptable, move it further away from him, pick up the acceptable and give it to him. If he is stubborn and actually TAKES the unacceptable, just calmly take it away and turn your back on him for no longer than 1 minute (pups have short attention spans). -If he takes the acceptable, give him a treat and lots of praise. -Continue to pet/praise him for at least a minute while he plays with his toy. Be liberal with the treats at first, then taper off and substitute with praise and petting. -Resume your previous activity within the general area, repeating the above as necessary. -If you are consistent with praising him when he selects a toy to play with, then within a few days your pup prefer his toys and not the cardboard. I this helps, this has worked times in our 3 dog household. divorced women dating
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