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I think you have done the right thing to book a counselor. It sounds like you know to work on the communication, and that both parties should speak about how they feel about the situation. The husband feels desperately inadaquate, enough to snap like that on the job! The feels sleepy, and you feel afraid of giving up your current situation to embrace another. (note to dumbasses: I am aware that I have no knowledge of what anyone feels. This is just an example. Dumbass.) Personally, I would be to death that the would me as a thing he could move where ever he pleased, and once I did make the actual move he would never respect me again and walk all over me. I would make him know that I have thought about it and am somewhat okay with the move, which is why I be making it at all. And that I probably be a bit stressed for the first week while I'm having to tolerate all new things but get to know the good places in the area and have make plenty of friends. I would research zoos, museums, groups, neighborhoods, just stuff around the area, and share with him my feelings, mostly but probably not all positive, about them. Because it really does need to be about you, although I'm all for you supporting your husband like you want to, but your life has got to be at least 50% about you, otherwise it's not your's, now is it. Again, you are on the right track. All the issues here stem from feelings, whether it's him feeling pushed around by his superiors or untapped in his potential or frustrated at routine, or you feeling ignored in the making of a big decision or stretched thin between outer family and husband or crushed at being ripped out of your stability. is frustrated he can't roam where ever he pleases and get into everything and sooo sleepy but wants to more things! (Just ideas, not what they actually feel.) You've already taken steps to resolve, keep it up! :) good pussy SycamoreIt is not important whether you are right or some of the others are right about her feelings and intent. The only way that can be resolved is to get inside her head. The red is the lack of communication that seems to exist between the two of you in an almost year LTR. You can say what you like to me but you can not deny the facts. One of the foundations of a strong relationship is communications. Even if you two get back together, if this is not resolved this just happen again and again until resentment sets which most couples never recover from -stories become exaggerated. I am not pointing to blame because there is none to give. The communication problem stem with her or you or the both of you by the way you handle stressful situations. Some close up some run away and other become verbally or more none of them any good because of misunderstandings run rampant. Even if you believe you both have a great communications (fooling yourselves!), one of the only reasons someone not be talking is that they are considering opting out of the relationship it says there are problems in your relationship that can not be changed without communications. Your talking about change tells me that is a point of contention here. Not saying you are the problem or not the problem or that her expectations be unrealistic .but these are areas that need to be discussed and agreements must be followed with an accountability set up. If you two can not abide by this without resentment of unfairness then you two have a. If these feelings do come up you two must have a way to communicate this without hurt feelings being developed. There is so much more to this that some serious reading is ed for. You both have to have the trust (another foundation) to feel you can say anything to your partner without fear. What others think when they think of trust is not the trust I am speaking of. Active listening is also lacking, the other side of the coin of communication! older women younger men
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the amount of times you said it? You only need to say it but once unless you have new insight which you did not have! I am only judging you by the very same standard you are applying to me. If you have read all that I wrote I was actually attempting to help the in this whole mess -I apologize I did not state that. But I test the waters at times to what the reactions are -so I do apologize for that. But I really try to what the PO reactions are and they tell a far different story. Yes it is a pet peeve that I read some POs actually come here looking for advise while others just come to blow off steam and others come to blow off stem by wrapping their anger up in the pretense of seeking advice but are only here to vent. I have NO objection to either endeavor, venting or seaching advice, but it is a waste of time to read and consider a poster's question but to find out they are only here to vent. Waste of time and effort of others to read and waste effort where there is no to seek advice but justification! el Noelville, Ontario horny lady visiting dude seeking oral fun
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