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Alimony in CA is completely negotiable. You give one party or there other some concession in return for greater or less alimony. However, when you first start the divorce process, you can calculate guideline temporary alimony based on the dissomaster program. You input a bunch of financial variables and it spits out a result. If you have an attorney, they can run the dissomaster program for you. If you do not have an attorney, you might be able to use the dissomaster at certain courthouses. The downtown LA courthouse has it available for attorneys and you might be able to sneak in an use it. Anyway, besides your income it looks at tax deductions and other adjustments to income, support or alimony that you pay from previous marriages, etc. Whether you would get support at all depends on how you were married. You normally receive spousal support for half of the number of years you were married, unless you were married over 10 years. If you were married over 10 years, you normally have to pay spousal support until you retire. dating phone in Tennessee
what you are WILLING to put up with it. You knew the answer already BEFORE you even posted your question here. Kick him to the curb. No need to give him any ultimatum what so ever. He knew how you felt, because you told him and also you both were in counseling. Habit is hard to change, and if he does not do it in front of you, he do it behind your back. Why do you want to invest more time with him? Are you afraid to be alone? If you want to screw up your life and have more stress, you can do that by yourself. You don't need this guy who gets into your nerve day after day. Why did you have to put up with his ex-wife and their enchiladas? Get rid of him, and those enchiladas go with it. If you need extra income to subsidize his share, rent your room out. He probably has done it all the time you dated him before moving in. You ignored it and now it comes to a boiling point. Habit is hard to change. How does that go: "hit the road, don't come back no more no more" naked girls from PelicanI'm sorry you are in this situation. First, because even though you have a good income, your expenses exceed your income and your hubby is still of the mindset that he is earning the big bucks he was earning before. Also, it must be extremely frustrating that he won't listen to you. It sounds like you might need a couples counselor as much as an outside financial adviser, but I would bet Hubby would resist both. As someone who was in a similar situation, I can tell you that harping on it not help. He think you are not supportive or that you are undermining his potential success with negativity. You need to remind him that you him and appreciate his hard work. Do not quibble over which Chinese restaurant is cheaper. In fact, try not to talk about money at all for a while. Then one day, go for a picnic in the park and while he is in a good mood, tell him you need his help. Tell him you are sad. Tell him you are worried about the future. If he loves you, he want to make you happy. He want to help you. Put the ball in his court. But you must insist he start handling the finances or at least sit down with you to go over the bills. Divorce is not the answer. It sounds like you need each other. You have family members whom you have helped in the past with no expectation of repayment. You might have to rely on their help without expectation of repayment. Finally, you should consider filing bankruptcy to get out from under your debt. He might think that is immoral too, but you might have no choice. internet online dating
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