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You mention an 18 year old, I'm assuming there are also younger involved. My ex had two and I went through all of it dealing with their mother. Eventually I had to step back from the details of their interaction. They are the mother and father of these, they have to make their own decisions. You've taken on a lot of baggage and it won't end until the last one is grown up and support is over even then she still be in their lives. Adults things are between adults. You the and show them that, but if it comes down to issues between mom and dad, you just need to tell them you them but their mom and dad have to work things like that out. Otherwise your life be consumed with their drama and trust me, your marriage won't survive. I did a lot of fighting on behalf of my stepchildren to provide them with the first stable home life they had in years and to show them what a normal life was like. You can do all of this without getting involved in things like support and a backpack. And as far as "paying for meals", ask the 18 year old how he would like to deal with it. Maybe he wants to show up with a grocery bag of food for the weekend. Maybe the easy way out is to give him $20 to run to McDs for every meal. Ask him what he thinks it would take for this to not be a problem for him. Ironiy after my ex and I split, the mother decided to take my advice and go into counseling. No for dad, he chose his path and it didn't include his. Continuing to fight with her was more important than what was best for the. But she did come out of it with a healthier way of dealing with the, their disappointments and their relationship with their father. I would say that if any of this influences their attitude or school, family counseling on your side is in order. Bottom line, you are on the sidelines of this and the two of them have to choose how they are going to deal with the and each other. It isn't your fight. If you can your husband and your stepchildren and put the rest of that stuff out of your mind, support them without taking sides, and just them it be enough. Or as in my case, it not be. i need a sexy personal assistantI definitely prefer positive loving people and environments, and would rather make someones day than totally shit in their face but I've learned in this life a few things * Nothing is ever perfect in life, not even my mother * Your are your life. * Marriage is a commitment to each other and is sacred, even if it is not "traditional". * Some rules can be broken and forgiven, some cannot * If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all * Always choose your battles wisely you cannot win them all. * All people have addictions, some are just more hurtful than others, good and bad I didn't have much of a choice to ever live a "normal" life, the first time my step brother "showed me some stuff" was when I was only 6 years old but I have learned that everyone, including ones we and ones we don't even know can be so very hurtful its so much easier to tear someone down than lift them up was how they were taught. I know my soul is a loving caring committed fighting soul and thats what matters most, I'm going to find happiness someday. I would also never say a negative thing to someone who didn't deserve it so if you think you are entitled to give some shit then you better be prepared to back it up I've gotten a lot of training and experience from putting up with others Just be prepared when you have to answer to the one that matters most it doesn't matter what I think Thanks again girls wanting sex
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