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Thank you again! I just wanted to thank you so much for ur replies. Yours hit home the most, well in our type of relationship. I know that it's not the most conventional relationship, but for most of the 20 years, it has worked. Your totally right! I did read every reply, and though some weren't what I wanted to hear, it did give me a good insight, and were non biased, so it was a good place to turn to, to get a good feel on how she might feel. Your also right in that 20 yrs is alot longer than most marriages now days, and u just don't walk away without trying by everything possible. I really do my wife, and it's not like some stated. They made it seem like I bring guys home, and she has to fuck whoever I want to bed with, and that's just not the case. My wife is very intelligent, She is a nurse, so she has the means and the to leave if she do chooses! Trust me, she knows what an abusive relationship is, and if that were the case, she would be gone. I seem to that like u stated, "she might be bluffing, and just wants me to use Better judgment. With that said, I just wonder how do u crucify a person. I think sometimes if done to, it damaged the relationship more. Trust me, she thought about leaving, I heard that from her at first, but I also gave it some thought, and asked herself if u leave for the one (4 times in my case) error, or do you look at the 20 years overall. are all grown now and out of the house, and she is more financially able to leave than what I am! Thanks again! married woman Darlington South CarolinaI think there are LOTS of happily married people, though I have no idea if it's 'most'. I think there are a few things that play into the appearance of lots of unhappy couples. 1. Generational reasons for marriage. My grandparents probably never should or would have married each other if they came of age now. They wed very and stuck it out through things I wouldn't have (like -). My mom divorced 2x. She's a boomer. I think for her generation, for some the pendulum swung the other way. Suddenly you didn't have to put up with crap and lots of people didn't however they still married. I'm 34, and though my generation is not without issues, lots of us delay marriage quite a bit, and go into it with a little different expectations. Most of my friends, and myself are very happy in our marriages. We're no where near 25 years so we'll -! Fingers crossed. Also, these days you don't HAVE to get married the way you use to, and being is loads more acceptable, so marrying the opposite sex to 'pass' isn't done as much any more. Thank goodness. 2. Unhappy people talk, happy people shut up. You'll always here more about who's unhappy than happy. I think this skews perception. 3. For some people, what they still have in common after years IS their, so I understand why that's such a hot topic. But, I sure don't think that's everyone. I know, for instance, my mom loves me and my brother more than anything and can't wait to be a grandmother. BUT, she travels, sits on local government boards, reads a ton, volunteers like mad. She's one interesting. All her friends seem equally fascinating. It's all who you surround yourself with. 4. Parting thoughts If you feel like marriage is a trap, DO NOT GET MARRIED!!! I think it's so positive that marriage is becoming reserved for those of us who REALLY want it. And I think when you do commit to someone who deeply wants to commit to you, it's actually a very freeing experience. But I deeply respect anyone who chose not to wed knowing it isn't what they want. Choice is such a wonderful thing. casual encounter
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