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After any relationship, it is always advisable to test the waters first. Whether you know it or not, you already have. Some men have no concept of "being fiends". Some men really dont care how you feel and put on the smile just to manipulate his way either into your heart, pants or bank account. Fortunately, there are a few that honestly care and have feelings for a woman. (stop laughing ladies) My girlfreind passed away suddenly at the age of 45 on Thanksgiving morning last year which was devistating to say the least. My world ended. I could not breathe. Eventualy, I began to date a mutual friend of my past girlfriend who can not believe she is living her dream life now. As a small example, I always open the car door for her. Not just when people are around, but everytime. I never forget to say please, thank you and your welcome. Although I not get the same response, it does not matter. I know what makes me feel good. I treat her the same way I treated my past gf, with respect. When you lose your soulmate, you learn very quickly that you are never guarrenteed tomorrow. I try, to the best of my ability to make someone happy, including myself everyday without becoming a "people pleaser". Life really IS too fukn short. Why NOT take the time to actually STOP .and smell a or flower? At 48, I've learned a valuable lesson .live for today because nothing is forever. So dont waste your time with people that stunt your growth both mentally and spiritally. Stick with the winners they are out there. All you need to do is look with your heart. - Portsmouth nude women- to hell I get my point across in a way that make you wake up and smell the roses. First off: A failure of a marriage is not usually anyone's fault. You didn't go into a marriage thinking it was going to fail. Well, guess what. None of us. It happens, and often for a lot less than an abusive spouse. It could be for a fricken paper cut. It doesn't matter. Who cares. It happened. The fact is, it gets you and a out of a very toxi relationshilp. You tolerate him *throwing* groceries. What's next? he get angry at you for holding a fussy? What, he shoves you to the ground, and get seriously hurt? Please don't look me in the eye and say "he wouldn't do that." In my lifetime, I know women who said "he wouldn't hurt me. He loves me. It is just a thing we are going through." I just saw one friend last week. I visit her once a month at the graveyard. She is buried next to her infant daughter. He got 16 to life. He is already out of prison. She said "he wouldn't hurt us, either." Those were the last words I have heard from her. Now do you where this comes from? His behavoir is NOT normal. And YOU KNOW IT. You want it to go away. Guess what, you are living in an alternate universe because nine times out of ten, that does NOT happen. It is like an alcoholic. They make promises and at the time, they mean every word they say. But something clicks in their. And they can't control themselves. Do you think your husband WANTED to throw the groceries out across the drveway in front of you, and his parents? I imagine he didn't even realize he did it at first and then didn't give a damn that he did. He needs help. And NO. YOU CANNOT HELP HIM. What you can do is take the and get out. You CAN his doctor. You can a psychiatrist for him and for you. You CANNOT stop or change his behvavior. Wishing it stop is not going to work. Continued. married wife
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