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This hit you the hardest because you bought into the whirlwind romance idea. You might have vocalized a more pragmatic stance with him but your emotions were pouncing on the promise that it could be true. Understandable. This hit you hardest than the other relationships because you're in your 30's now. You're ready for serious. You WANT serious. Understandable. All your emotions are understandable but illogical. You have posted that you pointed out the logic of the situation to him times. However, your emotions REALLY wanted to believe and now it's over. You're lucky. REALLY lucky. Imagine being married when he pulled the rug out from under you like that. Imagine having with him when he decided he was "out of now". That would be a whole lot worse. It hurts and I'm sorry but only two months with a guy like that makes you lucky. There. I said it again. Now, you need to tell yourself how lucky you are. Over and over again until you start believing it. You mentioned anger. Sure, I'd be super pissed. However, again, looking at the bigger picture you got out cheap. Vent, journal, cry, eat ice cream, some air guitar, etc. When you're ready make the decision to move on. It won't help to know why he did it. It's his nature and now he's gone. If he comes back? You don't deserve that and after healing you wouldn't WANT that. Let that idea go too. I'm sorry. I you heal from this. sex with someone Douglas freei'm reminded of fav i play on my guitar by garcia, kreutzmann, and ed -'s tower: your eyes looked from your mother's face In another times forgotten space Your eyes looked from your mother's face Wallflower seed on the sand and stone the winds blow you safely home. Roll away the dew Roll away the dew Roll away the dew Roll away the dew I'll tell you where the winds dwell In -'s tower there hangs a It can ring, turn night to day It can ring like fire when you loose your way. Roll away the dew Roll away the dew Roll away the dew Roll away the dew God save the that rings that It have one good ring, you can't tell One watch by night, one watch by day If you get confused listen to the music play. (instrumental) Some come to laugh their past away Some come to make it just one more day Whichever way your pleasure tends If you plant ice you're gonna harvest the wind. Roll away the dew Roll away the dew Roll away the dew Roll away the dew In -'s tower the winds sleep Like hounds the lighthouse keep Wildflower seed on the sand and wind the winds blow you home again. Roll away the dew Roll away the dew Roll away the dew You'd better roll away the dew Roll away the dew Roll away the dew Roll away the dew You'd better roll away the dew roll away. married but wants
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