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just looking for other lesbians No, don't tell you wife to move out. But do talk with her. If you can be cool about it all, you can probably prevent whatever she is about to commit and save your relationship. much, the outlook of your talk for it to have the desired affect should be like this: while I trust you and respect you right to your friends as I know that you only me and would never cheat, this situation makes me uncomfortable it would probably make you uncomfortable too, if the roles were reserved let's brainstorm and what can we do so that you don't feel like I am controlling your friendships but at the same time I also don't feel slighted for example, we can do things like: can we out all together at least fro part of the time, or can have an agreement that you are always back by midnight (and on those nights that you are out I might go out with my own friends and also be back by midnight), or right before you go out on something that looks too much like a date, we'll have sex so that you don't get all turned on by your male friends that night. -threat it like a family puzzle you two can solve, not like she is a villain and you are a saint kinda thing. Some women and men need friendships with the opposite sex that might include flirting even if they are married, the key to not letting it spin out of control is talking about it openly and agreeing on some rules that are acceptable to BOTH of you. She might not be romantiy interested in that guy at all but might enjoy his attention. Another thing you can do here is give her more attention and do more stuff with her that she enjoys so that she does not feel like she needs some other guy to admire her and do with her stuff that she likes. But that part is not up for discussion/bargaining with her, just go ahead and do that stuff and you'll the results. Saying "I watch a movie with you if you won't ever out with that guy" would have the opposite effect. Just watch the stupid movie, take her out, do whatever you need to win her to spend time with you back.
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ca65 Kahoka Missouri brunette for discreet meetingsHard to help you for reasons: your negativity, the stubborn way you cling to cognitive distortions, the way your mind roams from problem to problem so when someone tries to address problem X and causative factors A B, you respond with problems Y Z and causative factors C through G. Look, getting fired IS a massive ego blow for anyone. I am sincerely sorry it happened. Though I KNOW it's the toughest lesson in town, I sincerely you learn from it. Because you have a lot to learn. You really do. And believe it or not, this is the PERFECT time to learn and embark on big changes. It IS an opportunity to make a new start: to take an honest look at yourself, address standing problems, SOLVE them, and move forward from a stronger position. I nothing wrong with going home to regroup. It's a a good idea. The questions are: Is this right time? And is going home tantamount to blowing up your marriage? In trying to sort through that, I end up back at square one: that you're hard to help because your mind complicates accumulates problems, instead of simplifying resolving them. Attempting to cut through ALL the tangles you're further tangling, I end up with this: You ABSOLUTELY must get some decent support in your life. Neediness is the issue that's wrecking your career, relationships, and probably your marriage. It makes you anxious, demanding, critical, self-centered, and ineffective. You’ve ignored my suggestion that avail yourself of professional help, but I'm going to say more about it anyway. IMO, therapists aren't miracle workers. You need a lot more than 50 minutes per week of complaining to a therapist. For that reason, I strongly suggest you: A) Learn cognitive therapy techniques, become EXPERT at them, use your to apply them objectively and religiously. You DESPERATELY need clarity, DESPERATELY need to distinguish fears from facts. Understanding CBT and training your mind to stop awfulizing get you there. B) Join a therapy or support group ASAP. IMO you benefit greatly from group support feedback. I, personally, found it far more beneficial than individual therapy. It “help:” you’ll have a group of helpers who’ll take the pressure off your relentless demand for help in other spheres of life C) Go to individual therapy, as well, so you have a supportive person to talk to. fat woman xxx
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