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While I adore strong women and always have, and while a woman "taking charge" turns me on to no end (actually ONLY strong women turn me on), there really is no concern about being at this point. I am well past the point where anyone can do anything to me. While I still feel in some ways like that small blonde boy, I am not a small and have a tendency to intimidate people without meaning to. This is why I also feel confused because, for example, the one woman I fell totally in with was very strong, dominant, but small and petite so I was not only following her lead and letting her lead me to exciting experiences that I would not have on my own, at the same time I felt extremely protective of her and DID protect her. That's where my confusion between submissive and dominant comes from she was "running the show" and I only wanted to please her but I also felt like her guardian, advisor in those areas she had less experience in, etc. How can I be submissive if I feel no need to be protected by someone, and feel more like a protector? That's what I ask myself. I have actually had women I don't know come on to me very strongly, grab my hand and drag me to their bed BECAUSE they felt that I had been their protector. (stopping abusive men from harassing them in a bar, etc.) I do have some very dominant aspects to my personality. That's why I feel confused. looking for brie from De Kalb Illinois treeand know nothing about the woman in the picture. I was talking pure parenting philosophy. And it has been a few years since I read his books, my spawn are older now and as well adjusted as they're going to get, I suppose. But if memory serves me, he never said 'go pick up your happy toddler who is digging in the sand, and pop that kid back in the sling,' or 'demand that your sleep with you when he/she is asking for her/his own room,' or 'force to breastfeed who want to wean.' A kid in your bed changes your sex life, surely, for both parents unless they sleep separately? The fact that Sears is a, is a, there mostly are two genders. Does this invalidate his parenting strategies? Maybe I didn't read his books with my feminist glasses on. Attached doesn't mean overbearing, clingy, and all up in your bizness. His strategies would be creepy if they were attached partnering, attached coworkering, etc. But they aren't. It's attached parenting. Parenting an infant is a whole different kind of human relationship, requiring different behavior and strategies. Some of this stuff that is striking people as so crazy and revolutionary is how stuff was done for millenia. around until they can walk. Sleep next to them so you can feed them in the night and not have to go hike through the house to warm bottles of high fructose corn syrup crap that makes them sick. Motherhood as a core identity is creepy for a lot of us. Nobody says it has to be YOUR core identity. But would you want a dentist in your mouth who dabbles in dentistry occasionally while watching TV and talking on the phone? Some people want to be moms full-time, and that's ok. Kudos, gals. lady xxx
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