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and immature. i think it is really sad that you couldn't find your wife attractive anymore or her anymore after she got a tattoo. that is simply unbelievable to me. and i'm not a big fan of men trying to control women, or anyone trying to control their partners. while you didn't forbid her to get a tattoo or change her appearance, you certainly made sure she felt the consequences of making those choices, by distancing yourself from her and ultimately ending the relationship. you did, with your behavior, say what she could or couldn't do. the message was, "you can get a tattoo, but i'm not gonna like you anymore." how is that NOT telling her what she can do? we cannot make any person do exactly what we want. if we feel the need to control people like this there are issues there. being in an adult relationship, is about choosing someone that you accept as they are, and understanding that things can change. if she had been your girlfriend and not your wife, i would have less of an issue with deciding that you weren't into her anymore. but marriage is supposed to be a deep commitment that withstands the trials of life i'm not sure that you took it very seriously if a tattoo could be part of ending it. bbw for a different kind of relationship
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