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My boyfriend just returned from a (work) trip. Something very stressful happened, and he drank. He hadn't had anything to drink in 45 days. He's been to a few meetings recently and was in AA a few years ago sober for about a yr. Anyway he confessed he had broken down had a couple of glasses of wine. He said he wanted me to know. I tried to be supportive. I wasn't sure how to react or what to say. I didn't *feel* a whole lot, so I just told him I wasn't disappointed in him (I know from history he's probably already being hard enough on himself to have me add to it negatively). Maybe part of the problem is my not saying something more in order to protect his feelings. Here's where the (other) current problem lies the next morning I noticed him pull 2-3 mini-travel bottles of gin from his on bag. I don't know if they were empty or not. Later that evening I told him I wanted to ask him about something told him I'd seen the bottles, appreciated him telling me about the wine, wasn't sure what to make of the gin, didn't want to make any assumptions or judgments, so that's why I was bringing it up. He said he was embarrassed and didn't know what to say. I didn't either! Given last night was also a special occasion, I didn't push it. We hugged a bit (me comforting him?) and carried on with our evening. In the middle of the night I woke up fully aware of the fact that he had lied by omitting a significant piece of info. yet told me about the wine b/c "it was the right thing to do." But not mention the gin!? Did telling me about one thing cancel the other out? He had made his big "confession" of sorts but left at least of the story out? I know he's lying to himself, right? But he's also lying to me and with so much ease it's unsettling (as if lying wasn't enough). I imagine he would he have told me if the bottles were still full? There have been other things he has downplayed to say the least. His own self-esteem issues are so great, he has so much shame can I trust someone who can't be honest with themselves? Did he realize he was lying or did he actually believe in that moment that he was being entirely truthful with me? And, in the end, does that really matter? Any insight personal experiences, advice would be appreciated. Thank you. looking to start somthinI owe so much to this board for helping me prepare for this weekend in both a practical and emotional sense. Thank you for your comments, discussion and all of that was so helpful. I'm glad that we took our time and when through the process. We were fortunate enough to meet just the right guy. Our personalities and sensibilities all meshed. Having sex with a, who in ways is a stranger, while your husband watches, sounds inherently awkward. But Saturday we never felt that., my lover, made it so easy. He said he was just so thankful that we trusted him enough to invite him inside our marriage that simply being a part of our intimacy was special. The day started slowly with some wine and cheese and conversation. told us that he'd only participate if and when we wanted him to. That lack of expectation was so nice. All the pressure was off. The day evolved organiy. and I were so connected the entire time. Without a word, we adjourned upstairs. And for a moment I almost forgot was still there until I heard him creaking up the stairs behind us. We were on the bed kissing and touching and sucking and took a seat in our comfy chair in the far corner. He was quiet and I wouldn't have noticed him if I wasn't craning my neck every so often to watch him watch us. Every so often our eyes would meet and his intense steely focus would send shivers. I'd gotten off a few times and my pussy was throbbing, but not for now. Rather for my handsome, strong lover. When I'd noticed that he'd discreetly unfastened his jeans and was slowly stroking his very swollen cock, I swore the sound of my heart echoed through the room. My pussy gushed and and I shared one, passionate kiss and squeeze, before I whispered to him that I was ready for. must have sensed it was time as he stood, his erect cock pointed straight at me as he stepped out of his jeans and his tshirt. moved in his direction and said something and smiled, nodded and muttered I know. When he cupped my ass with his large strong hand and hungrily kissed my neck, I came, intensely but discreetly, for the first of times. over 50 dating
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