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Go a little bit out of your comfort zone. You don't have to be Mr. "Life of the Party". Sit quietly at the bar. Say hello to the people around you. If there's a TV on, make a comment about something on the screen. don't go there with the idea that you are going to hook up or find your perfect mate or anything. Go with the idea that you are going to have a beer or two and enjoy the company of other men and maybe have a nice conversation. Too expectations are what defeat you. Also realize that you are a worthwhile person that must have something to offer. Think about the people in your life who you. They do that because they something in you that's worth loving. Concentrate on those things that you are good at. By God, if you crochet better than anyone, own it!! If you make a lasagna better than anyone, then celebrate that. Focus on what you DO have, not what you don't (ie perfect body and/or boyfriend or or whatever). looking for a cool fun guy
here's the up to the minute truth. i sent him an this afternoon (in response to his latest of flurry of wanting to rehash all of his grievances, tell me how much he loves me and hint at maybe coming back) where i basiy told him why i him and have felt confident about our, but that i was going to move on since he left me, but if he could get clear on what he wants and agree to counseling, he knew where to find me and perhaps, if i were still available and still had feelings for him blah blah blah. when i wrote the, it felt like i was being sort of vulnerable and stating my truth, but after i sent it, i felt sort of angry, and like you said that its maybe time to shut the door all the way on this no matter what. i know the part of me that's holding on is afraid he come around/change/be able to offer me all the great that i want (that he often is) and i have missed it because i shut the door. im really torn between thinking it doesn't harm me to say, you can reach out if you get your mind right, maybe ill still be here and saying done and done. which likely eventually lead to him reaching out and saying all the right things and ill have to just assume i cant trust him. he's not a sleeze or a d-bag. he knows he's conflicted and he knows he has to reconcile the part of him that wants to go and the part that wants to stay. i guess the fear is what i outlined above, that ill say no more forever and out on the of my life. its especially hard because he's so wonderful for much of the time, until he shuts down and runs away. it's just not cut and dry at least not to me. a little kink never women who want to be fuckedNo one in the party take the vp slot. She loves her family so much she take a job that take her away from them. So much for family first. All she has to offer is a mean streak and knowlege of governing a small town. Great. long haired girl dating
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