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Sounds really complicated. Sounds like you've been "playing" house and that he's not ready for the kind of commitment that you want, need or believe you should have. I wish that my ex and I would have had the sense to let-go early on in our relationship when we both could heal, learn from the experience, find somebody that is better suited for us, and keep from destroying what had become our shared. Our biggest mistake was getting married very, when the hormones were in hyperdrive and before one or both of us could define what we are and what we expect from a partner. Although we loved each other (and probably still do), isn't enough to sustain a term relationship because the minor and differences burn out the two parties over time. My advice. First, get your but to a therapist so that you can learn what needs are being, or had been satisfied by this relationship. This doesn't mean finding out what defects you or your sweetheart have, but rather why you're where you're at. Second, consider moving out and separating. I really believe that it is unhealthy for any couple to be living with other adults until they have established their identity as a couple. Also, being around mom and dad puts extraordinary stresses onto you and your husband, especially to maintain the image that you're both good, well behaved adults. The truth is, is that nobody's perfect and sometimes you've got to have room to find out about yourself. Having mom and dad next door makes that all but impossible. Best of luck. If I had my choice we (my ex and I) would have worked it out. You can only imagine the loss that both of us and our two teenage sons have and are experiencing after being together for twenty years. horny old in Ipswich Massachusetts
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