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He has taken a ton of responsibility over the past 6 months, and has tried so hard to come to terms with this, even giving his wife the benefit of the doubt over and over again. Given his history, I think it is safe to say that we know this is a very real struggle for him and that he has even taken responsibility when he shouldn't have, to the point of enabling her. To me, watching this entire thing unfold since last has convinced me that what he says is an accurate representation. He's gone through the berating from us CLers, and actually listened to our advice, nice or not. He has sincerely tried to make this work, times without speaking ill of his wife, and only speaking ill of himself. still looking have some adult sex linesHere are things you said that I want to focus on: 1) She's a sarcastic feminist, who doesn't work or drive a car? Let's think about this. To me a feminist has learned how to hold her own in the world, as an equal, etc. How can a feminist be dependent on mom, dad, and bf and never work, never supported herself? She is in for a rude awakening if she ever starts working in the real world. Life is not idealistic like she has in her head. 2) You cannot be yourself at her home. How did it feel for you when she was in school and out of state? Now that she's back in state she is grading on your nerves a bit. 3) She's been back home since? 7 months. What's she done lately, how does she spend her time M-F when you are working 12 hour days? 4) What is her? If she hasn't worked a part time job by now, at 20 years old, then I'm concerned she not adjust well to the demands of the working world. Maybe she's hiding behind the veneer of feminism, and not driving, as an excuse to remain in her cocoon of being taken care of by mom, dad and bf. It is past time for her to venture out into the working world, and start driving. Spending time apart help you get your head together about this relationship. If you aren't ready to break up, then maybe you can start by going home a few hours earlier than is the routine. When she says "my home is your home" you can calmly explain why that isn't a true statement. And you can mention that her refusal to drive or work is getting confusing for you. These are your feelings, and not up for debate. love and relationship
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