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I think purt near everyone here knows about my passion, but prior to ten years ago I didn't know it existed. I did good work as an admin, and certain things made me feel fulfilled (I finishing projects), but I've found something that gives me that feeling waaay more often. I always loved, have never minded getting dirty, problem solving and medicine, and it wasn't natural for me to try to fit into corporate either by behavior, looks, or mindset. My office jobs never took kindly to my hippie/rebel side, and even though I'd nearly forgotten it existed (I wore bows in my hair, no lie!), I still struggled with trying to fit in and couldn't communicate with others about things I had no interest in. I suspect that finding one's passion is about the parts that resonate with you and what you find deeply satisfying: Do you like problem solving? Working with others? Is being a part of a bigger movement important? Do you getting your hands dirty? Do you find organizing to give you a rush of endorphins? Is the rush from winning the prize a moment that fills you with pride months later? What activities do you doing, that give you a rush or endorphins or really complete satisfaction? If it's kayaking, what are the careers available there? Do you like teaching, too? Do they do rescue work or surveying via kayak? Does a better kayak need to be developed? I'm much rambling here, just exploring the concept for myself. Thanks for letting me! still looking patientlyHere is where I believe and that's an honest opinion, not some fun jab to try and bash away where I think you have a control issue and invite drama. Your words I did that with my ex, I said, Ok, here is what I am willing to offer a completely reasonable offer honestly OVER nice he said no, so I chopped off his balls in divorce court it was fun. and I STOPPED. lol I sometimes do poke his buttons But only after he tried to do it to me. Lol its not my fault I am better at it. Lol. I expect a small amount of "that was handled well." or "this might have been a better approach." Now that's just a few but what sticks out is your pleasure in control, words like 'I EXPECT', it was FUN I DO poke and then the backtracking of how you really don't I stopped and then LOL, there are lots of lol's aren't there, minimizing the wrong, it's like you're very dismissive and sneaky at it. Admit to a fault then minimize it. It honestly comes across like there is a part of you that wants to keep drama as high as possible so you can be the rescuer. You don't want to be known as one of the 'losers'. Look, the point of all of this is to someday reach INDIFFERENCE not hold superiority and I really feel you are on one side of that line. You can say I'm way off base but even the fact that you state quite clearly that you didn't EXERT any control shows that you feel you must have it in my opinion. I can go cold deadpan rational and work the issues logiy and I was very successful at it in my dealings in divorce as the saying goes in here, step on the throat..with a smile on your face and a civil tone..but fun? No I did what I HAD to do to protect my rights and my future. That's where I feel we differ greatly you seem to be reveling in this shit. don't pass that on chat online
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