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No I didn't let him slide for 15 years. We would get back together and he made promises, denied he was, and he went through counseling and he was very sneaky. He appeared to be doing nothing, acting like a saint. Then it all came to surface. He didn't cheat all 15 years, but he did his fair share. But I need to point out that his infidelity was just half the reason we weren't working out. That's the problem with most marriages though -it is more than a spouse cheating that tears a marriage apart. My respect both him and myself and actually were thrilled to know we were separating. A lot of times know that their parents are not "good" together and mine realized that during the teen years. As far as cohabitation, etc., I spoke to a friend of mine, who is an attorney, and she also agrees that it is highly unlikely for a judge to sign that one spouse cannot other people when the are around because the other is bitter. She says both parties must agree % and only then the judge consider it. She says each state varies but most favor both parents spending quality time with the, regardless. She also said that courts rarely look at one spouse as the "cheater" because now most states have the no fault divorce, or irreconcilable differences, meaning neither is at fault and the marriage is beyond being repaired. If one spouse wants out, by all means I say let them go and move on, but keep it civil between the parents because are allowed to both parents no matter what. 49093 bay xxx sexToday started off excellent, and then I had to my separated wife of 5-6 weeks. Now I’m having really strong mixed emotions. After not seeing my wife for weeks, I had to meet and exchange money, vehicle, and sign a post-nuptial. Prior to this separation she was “going downhill” fast from drinking, smoking, probably taking pills. She was one of the most attractive women you’ve ever seen and still very attractive one year ago. She is not “old” (49). All our friends and family around that age are still active and. Today I barely recognized her. She gained weight, was dressed nice, but smelled like booze, her skin is all of the sudden wrinkling like crazy and changing color (smoking and drinking, liver). She is destroying herself physiy and emotionally. I know that it's best for me to get away from this toxic LTR. I was doing fine until I had to her. Sitting right next to her I asked myself, “Who is this person?” I didn’t feel the I ALWAYS feel towards her. I didn’t feel the attraction I ALWAYS have. The person I knew is gone. What a horrible ill feeling. Maybe we fall out of, but I know it’s not all me. I spoke to our neighbor who ran into her about 2 months ago and didn’t recognize her. The family doctor has told her this is a bad path. I have been to two therapists trying to make the marriage work and along with the family doctor; they all say it’s time for me to “throw in the towel.” “She’s not going to get better”. “You can’t fix this!” Everyone is seeing this rapid change too. Over time, regardless of changes, I have always loved my wife and cared for her. Even on her worst day I was very much attracted to her. What has happened? After today it feels like, “OMG my wife died!” I have determined that I should just let this night pass before I allow too emotions to overwhelm me. I’m trying, but this is tough and could use some advice on feeling better. Words of wisdom please; Thanks! girls xxx
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