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if that is all it takes? Everyone has periods in their relationship where they not make the move to intiate sex, but the is there. And like Happi2b mentions, there is a difference between stress relief and romance. Most masturbate, doesnt matter male or female, because you know it doesnt take. Few moments of alone time and it's done. No foreplay, no waiting on anothers responses, no comforting after. I relieve stress by masturbating (it's the quickest, most enjoyable, self serving method for me!), not embarassed or ashamed to admit that. Bad day at work, masturbate. Arguement with someone, masturbate. Can't find the right jeans to fit on my ass, masturbate. I could have sex with the guy I'm dating at the time, but I don't need to when it's just for a quick fix to my shitty mood. That's the key, it's a fix, not romance. And topping it off with whatever I'm dealing with it's just easier sometimes. I don't think I'd stop initiating sex with him though. Not if it's something you want and know he isnt going to turn it down. Have you ever tried "teasing" him? Or joining him while he masturbates? Personal questions, yes I know, but then again you started it ; ) If anything, give him time to come around. You know he still thinks you are beautiful/-, you already mention you don't think he's cheating, so keep initiating or pull back a little. sick of fake femaleswho is giving you negative ratings. You have a tremendous amount of insight and have read quite clearly between the lines. I didn't want to air all of the relationship dirty laundry right away, because I kinda wanted to get a sense how much of a strain I put on the relationship and what of our issues I should feel responsible for. There are definitely some good and valid points in defense of his point of view, and I needed to hear them from someone besides him. But yeah, its deeper than I've briefly summarized. I like honesty, even if it's brutal and I believe we should be with people we trust. He accepted it when I told him I would no longer talk to my ex, but I think he had his doubts about me at that point. Rather than confronting them or leaving me, some months later he cheated on me. With one of his ex's, no less. She emailed him out of the blue and you know how the story ends. (There's a BIG difference to me between an ex who is a regular, loyal friend, and those who /- out of the blue. I don't categorize them as being in your circle of friends, even if theres no bad blood. I get those s too, and I politely tell them that I'm in a relationship, you next lifetime) Up until he cheated, he was always jealous of something looking at that too hard, why are my jeans so tight?, I'm too friendly with guys, etc. I know now that was him projecting his thoughts onto me. FYI, Im a really tomboyish girl, gym shoes and jeans, and I don't own a shirt that shows cleavage. By most people's standards, I'm modest for a ish attractive woman. SO was definitely insecure before he got to me. I don't feel that is the path to a relationship. yes, this issue be the straw that caused our relationship to end. He hasnt had serious relationships, but I thought our friendship was the ultimate basis for a good relationship, so I tried to understand and forgive he begged for another, proposed and all (of course with no ring) I said I need time to trust him again. He has been inconsistent since. As I said in another post, talking to my ex/friend is not revenge but a matter of, "Why should I be bending to YOUR wishes and you're not even honest with me?" I know this might not be the right thing to do for our relationship. I want him to go to therapy with me but he wont dating match
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straight. There is a line between standing up for what you believe in and not fighting for your rights because you're too weak to do so. You've crossed that line. You don't WANT to take him for more than you're entitled, got ya. Well there's a starting point in that, showing him what you COULD legally ask for without any debate. Then make a reasonable offer but make it clear, look you giant twisted fuck, you don't dictate this shit. you are master of me no fucking more and I could give a fuck what you want. Here before you is a reasonable and LEGAL offer, take it or you'll find out how reasonable the judge thinks you are. Then maybe we'll know who's fucked in the head. This prick is your ENEMY, treat him with MIStrust and no holds barred. Now, there's a caveat to all of this. It is done without emotion, this is business. The meaning is clear, the tone civil. You NEVER rise to the bait, EVER. He knows if he blinks you'll turn that bloodsucker loose on his ass. You sound like you want to be decent, be it, but that doesn't mean you're afraid to grind his fucking bones into makeup powder. If you need some balls you can borrow mine for a bit I live down the street from mama, she's got 'em in a pickle jar on the back shelf of the pantry. big pussy Lonerock Victorville moms wanting sex
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