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but btdt my ex was entirely about HER self, while claiming that it was actually ME who is the selfish one. But hold on there Captain Nice Guy: Do not repeat DO NOT! "give" her the house. Sounds like no involved; why the fuck would you do that? Why can't you sell/dump the house and move on? Let her pay her own rent. I worked all through college (took me a DECADE to get my degree), why can't your? I think they that "enabling" tho I am not entirely sure about that term, either. But by taking it in the ass the way you are, you are encouraging her to keep sticking it up there. looking for friends nowmore later
I also learned the value of hard work and independence early. I started working when I was 12 years old and have been working ever since, and I am 62 now. We let them live in our home while we were away because the other alternatives were worse being an absentee landlord or leaving the house vacant, although the way they took care of it I think vacant would have been a better idea. At the time they got married they literally had nothing. When my wife and I got married at least I had a job. Neither of them even had that. There was no way I could have thrown them out and kept peace with my own wife. And yes, we gave them TWO cars when we went overseas both paid for. IF she comes back, and IF he takes her back (two bog "if" statements) unfortunately nothing change. The $ a month is off the table permanently. The offer to train her to take over my business be dependent upon her returning to school at her own expense and getting a degree, then taking the required training in my field and passing the Federal Exam that I be in place by then. I no longer make it easy for her. As far as making it harder for the, doing that is impossible and keeping peace in my own home. I tried that once before with the other (older). He is a bigger disaster than this. As a parent, what is the answer then? Act like Momma Bird and kick them out and cut them off on their 18th birthday? wanna have a hot nightHi I am reading your post , and couldn't figure it till you mentioned overweight. I feel for you , and here is my advice. There is a guy here in nyc named Null, he is a health guru, and not a fad diet person, nor a pill pusher. look up his feature length documentary, ed "It's Not Your Fault You're Fat". Watch it, and if you find new insight. This is no joke nor sarcasm, but if you want to change your life, a great place to start. He also has books on health , nutrition, and a vast range of topics, he's a visionary. You might have to really do a degree turn, but it could be worth it in the run. I'm thin, always have been, it's no guarantee of happiness, but it must help with relationships , although sometimes i think i'd be better off a monk lol peaceout from jersey ps learn how to cook (- food) if you don't know how. and use a revised food pyramid, look them up. especially on real age (dr oz) or null's website top online dating services
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