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My LTR started having depression issues the last several months. I tried to get him to seek help, but he blew off my concerns. I saw that he was drinking about a fifth of vodka a week, on top of a sleeping pill at night. He has sleep apnea; that is how this self medication of vodka came to my attention. It's a very risky combination. I asked him to stop, then I pleaded with him to stop. I found free clinics for him to go to, but he would not follow up. He was emotionally volatile, his sleep was horrible, he was always exhausted and on top of everything, he lied to me about his drinking. He finally admitted that he was drinking a fifth or more of vodka a week for about a year, and lied to me about it because he was afraid he would lose me. I remember how confused I was, because when I would talk to him on the phone at night, he was be somewhat slurry and more importantly emotionally up and down. He would post stupid things full of self pity or rudeness, always after 11. But again, denial, so I was intensely confused. Fast forward, I finally broke it off with him two months ago. He has spent the entire time trying to "win" me back, which I really dislike. I asked him not to try to "win" me back, but to take care of himself. Finally he began to admit this problems and started talking to friends besides just me, which is a big load off of my shoulders. Now, he has stopped drinking for about 3 weeks, he is on an anti-depressant for about 10 days. Today he is going to a therapist. Now, he says to me, "I am doing all the right things, let's get back together". I say it's too -; I have lost trust. He gets angry at me when i say i have lost trust and says that if we don't get back together, he lose the spark and for me. I guess I feel that ever since I broke if off with he has been guilting me. I wish I could trust, but damn, it took such a dramatic move on my part to get his attention, I am kind of burned out. So, here is my dilemma. I loved and still this, and wonder if depression caused such a change or not. I want us to work, but I just have to give it time. We are totally platonic right now, because I don't want to give mixed messages and also don't want to mess with my emotions. We have been together 4 years, but 2 of those years was a distance relationship. Any advise would be appreciated. single women of Brighton worthing littlehamptonkinda generalize about you damn Americans too. You try tellin an American.. esp from the south that its NOT their god given right to firearms and watch them try to make you change your mind with said weapons! LOL Thats actually the one thing that shocks me about the US.. is just how diverse it can be Canada is phsycially bigger, but less populated.. Newfies are goofy funny people with hearts of gold.. people complain abotu the french in quebec.. people in BC are pot heads.. Thats the extent of it.. But in the US you got dry counties, some that allow marriage, some that dont, some that legalize pot.. some dont.. just seems for such a "united" country the people, and more so the rules/laws/beleifs making up that country are far more diverse than the way we live up here.. I know way off topic and full of generalizations.. just an observation which was actually fed by a news story I heard where in Kansas a lesbian couple seek out a guy to donate sperm so they could have a kid fast forward some years.. the lesbian couple break up.. The biological mother of the goes on disability, and since kansas does not recognize same sex marriage/unions the government is now going after the sperm downer for support.. even though the lesbian couple never wanted him to be part of the deal in the first place.. Here it would be a nation wide ruling, not just state by state.. dating party
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