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My went to bed before us due to an early morning job and told us to enjoy ourselves. We along to some old songs, snuggled on the couch, and then started making out. He checked in with me before each shift in the dynamic of our intimacy to be sure he wasn’t overstepping any boundaries. I told him everything was fine and that the only reason we wouldn’t be able to have sex that evening would be because I didn’t want to disturb my sleeping by getting a condom. Luckily for us, he had one handy so we laid out a blanket on the floor of my fiancé’s music studio and had sex together for the first time in about years. The next morning while brushing our teeth together, I told my guy that “ our friend got laid last night.” He asked, “by you?” and looked a little shocked and/or hurt. I restated that yes, I’d had sex with our friend. After my shower, I checked in again to be sure I hadn’t unintentionally acted outside of his comfort zone. He assured me that my sleeping with our friend was not an problem, but he didn’t appreciate my delivery of such information because it sounded like I was shirking responsibility for my actions by saying HE got laid rather than WE had sex. I thanked him for making that clear, apologized for being insensitive by making a silly allusion to the joke we’d made the night before without first seriously letting him know what we did, and promised to do better next time. Later in the day, he asked me for more details, such as if we used condoms and the specific location of our connection. I confirmed that we used protection as is our agreement and asked if he would have preferred we not “invade his space” by using his studio. He took no issue with us being intimate in his room and told me he was grateful we didn’t wake him to get a condom from our bedside. I’m grateful for how we learn from each other how best to communicate our feelings and actions. horney woman Lagro IndianaWho has the authority to judge you and who decides whether your bad choice is more egregious than someone else’s bad choice? And after you receive judgment and punishment (unless of course you are perfect ;)) who is worthy to say whether you get a second. For me I it isn’t someone that thinks they are perfect I it’s someone that has failed like me. Using words like “mistake” and “bad choice” to me really hides the horror of the actions in question. And that’s what rankles me. Anyone can judge me for anything based on their own authority. That’s fine, you don’t have to like me, and we can respect each other’s space. People judge me for using cunt in a postive sense, that’s okay. No skin off my ass. The consequences of other people judging me is the issue. Someone can decide to dislike me because I say “cunt”, in which case nothing happens to me. Someone can decide to beat me up because they don’t like lesbians, which means I’m injured and my social calender be full of lawyer meetings and court dates for the next year. The bottom line is I am not going to do horrible shit that damages other people. Anyone that I harm has the right to judge me, and take me to court where I be sentanced. The community has a right to judge me, whether I have contributed good things or caused pain or destruction. Anyone who advocates for someone who can not stand up for themselves (like or -) judge anyone who harms them, and take action to effect a positive change. And I would that someone dealing out consequences at a trial is not a fellow animal abuser or molester. dating single parent
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