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cheating, so don't even plant that seed in your mind! second, in the two years that you have known him, how times has he done this? third, im a guy, and if i had a free day off during the week and i had a wheeler, you can bet your sweet ass i would lose track of time riding it! probably he didn't want to hurt your feelings, but he probably just wanted to chill at home and not have to get all dressed up, drag his kid over, watch them play for hours and then drive back home late, and then get up early for work. he probably figured that if he let time drag out you would cancel and he would be off the hook. it did not work. and im sure with the "hi" text he was feeling out how pissed you were. my advice, him, tell him you are very hurt and upset that he blew off you and your daughter. tell him that you need communication in your relationship, and if he did not want to come over that you would be understanding of his need for relaxation time. but, you cant be understanding unless he communicates his needs to you. tell him you would have been willing (if you were) to have done the bbq at his place so that way he didn't have to stop playing on the 4 wheeler, or you could have helped clean the yard, or bathe his kid. sounds like typical behavior to me! what happened definitely needs to be talked about, but not worth blowing your stack over. makeout and massage mondayyou can't make her happy. You're at your wits end enough to come here and ask us advice givers for our opinions. Which means, you've got no idea what you're doing. And you know what? You shouldn't. Even if you were a psychiatrist you shouldn't. Because it would be, as they it in the industry, a conflict of interest. The ugly truth of the matter is that when you date someone broken like this you can't fix them. While it sounds romantic its something straight out of fiction that is some overwhelming all powerful device that can solve all the world's, and people's personal ills. Tell that to the couple madly in with addiction problems. Or the posters who come here complaining about their bi-polar spouse. This is a serious mental pathology that needs intensive counseling and treatment. Not something you can treat with your. At the very least, you might be able to support her through intensive counseling to try and "fix" this. But I'll let you know, there's no fixing things like this. There's just developing the proper coping skills and tools that make it easier on her. And let me give you a little advice that you're most likely going to learn the hard way in this situation. The broken ones you help to put themselves back together again? When they're all fixed, confident, and secure in themselves? You know how they show you how grateful they are for your support? They leave. They become strong well adjusted people who no longer need your co-dependency to cope with their issues. And just like some of these people turn to and alcohol, others turn to relationships to make them feel better. With the language you use this is an almost textbook case of co-dependency to cope with sexual trauma. You're co-dependent on her and she is co-dependent on you. I've been in your shoes twice in my lifetime. And I wasn't really willing to hear people tell me I was co-dependent until I came to the realization that all my relationships crashed and burned in very tragic, very fiery ways. You're not willing to hear it now, but hopefully planting the seed help you in the future. Co-dependency isn't. And you're only satiating her addiction to relationships, not "fixing the hole in her heart with your -". casual sex encounters
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