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I'm going out tonight! It's Monday and some of you KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS IN CHICAGO! (sing voice, hint, hint). Haven't been over that way in like 2 months? 3? Jeez! Off to disco-nap and then off to where it's raining Holiday! looking at u thru glass
After Christmas, a teacher asked her pupils how they spent their holiday away from school. One wrote the following: We always used to spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa. They used to live in a big brick house but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Now they live in a tin box and have rocks painted green to look like grass. They ride around on their bicycles and wear name tags because they don't know who they are anymore. They go to a building ed a wreck center, but they must have got it fixed because it is all okay now, they do exercises there, but they don't do them very well. There is a swimming pool too, but all they do is jump up and down in it with hats on. At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out, and go cruising in their golf carts. Nobody there cooks, they just eat out. And, they eat the same thing every night early birds. Some of the people can't get out past the in the doll house. The ones who do get out, bring food back to the wrecked center for pot luck. My Grandma says that Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded someday too. When I earn my retardment, I want to be the in the doll house. Then I let people out, so they can visit their grandchildren. horny chubby ladies from BakersfieldHoliday Inn We are checking into the Holiday Inn! With the average cost for a nursing home care costing $ per day, there is a better way when we get old feeble. We have already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn. For a combined term stay discount and senior discount, it's $ per night. That leaves $ a day for: Breakfast, lunch and dinner in any restaurant we want, or room service, laundry, gratuities and special TV. Plus, they provide a swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer, etc Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap. money $5 worth of tips a day have the entire staff scrambling to help you. They treat you like a customer, not a patient. There is a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride free. The handicap bus also pick you up (if you fake a decent limp). church To meet other nice people, a church bus on Sundays. bus For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of the nice restaurants there. While you're at the airport, fly somewhere. Otherwise, the cash keeps building up. plane It takes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn take your reservation today. And you are not stuck in one place forever, you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city. Want to seeHawaii ? They have a Holiday Inn there too. TV broken? Light bulbs need changing? Need a mattress replaced? No problem. They fix everything, and apologize for the inconvenience. ambulance The Inn has a night security person and daily room service. The maid checks to if you are ok. If not, they the undertaker or an ambulance.. If you fall and break a hip, Medicare pay for the hip, and Holiday Inn upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life. party And no worries about visits from family. They always be glad to find you, and probably check in for a few days mini-vacation. pool The grand can use the pool. What more can you ask for? looking for fun
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