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as a Dom. I would NEVER do anything, that is , go out of my way and set up, plan and go through with any action as a means of punishment, only have him do or be denied something, it's all on him, all I have to do is think and command, IMO, that would in effect give him "power" in a way. I understand your thought though. discreet casual and safe sought for tonightNow you're asking how you fix it but in your previous post what did you say? My situation is different ie: SPECIAL That is the selfishness of your condition, a condition YOU are responsible for. That's right YOU. No, you're not responsible for your parent dying, nor perhaps % for the lack of employment but you are responsible for your reactions to them. Saying your situation is special is the ultimate cop out, a way of deflecting taking actual action so is the helpless routine, oh, how do I cope? I don't KNOW Look, I've been there. It was a really big factor in my first marriage failing. Faced with shit that happens in life I played the MY shit is harder than your's card and well yeah, to ME it was. Took a lot for me to let that go, took WORSE things to happen in order for me to stop adding to the shit going on in my life with my own inactions. Like I said, I had my laundry list too. I found out that once I got it through my thick fucking skull that feeling shitty about my situation wasn't going to do me any good and sure as fuck didn't excuse me from making my life better well what do you know, I got better. You want reasons why you can't do something? Fuck, too damn easy I'm sure you've got a ton of 'em. Too poor, too 'damaged' by your parent's death, no job, don't know how I'm sure you've got more. Fact is that the effort has to come from you, perhaps posting here was a start, you took the time to write on a board and get opinions..fine, you got some. So know what are you going to do? Help is out there, books both online and in hard copy articles for free and if you're unemployed, you've got some time to read now don't you? Also getting involved with LIFE, even if it's just a walk in the park or a visit to a coffee shop, get out and DO SOMETHING. We are all responsible for our own condition. That doesn't mean we won't feel sadness or times of helplessness it means it's up to us to DO something about it. These things you list that stop you they would be NICE but not absolutely necessary. Your effort is. dating friends
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