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I have a game of tug going on in my head I need some clarity from you wise folks. One side: my SO I have been talking about moving in together. I'm all for it EXCEPT his 24 yr old daughter lives at home while she works on getting a job. I really don't care for her much. Not being her parent, I don't have that innate for the quirks that this woman has (snarky, messy, irresponsible to a degree). I have wisely kept my opinions about this to myself. The final decision on my moving in has not been necessary since I am unemployed I want to have a job before I move in with my SO. Despite my ability to put it off, there has been an understanding that I would be moving in ish like in the next 3-4 months. To be clear, I DO want to move in with him. It's just that the situation isn't ideal right *now*. Other side: a GF of mine is about to loose her hubby (he's going to die -). She wants to pull up stakes move to to be closer to her daughter to get a fresh start. She wants me to move in with her is willing to cover the living expenses while I continue my job hunt. My GF I are super close I want to be there for her. The tug: My SO knows that I have hesitation about moving in, but only as far as I do not feel comfortable living with him AND his daughter. He still thinks, however, that once I land a job we'll be one big happy family under one roof. He looks forward to it like a kid on Christmas (I am such a fucking gift, ya know). Since his daughter isn't around much he thinks that her living there shouldn't be an issue. As for my GF, she really needs this safe-haven the knowledge that I be there as her friend as her room mate. She has stated that she really doesn't want to be alone a sentiment I can totally understand. The -: My SO be hurt/disappointed if I decide to move in with my friend not him. He could understand a short-term, I'm-just-helping-her-out scenario, but anything longer could really hurt him. If I commit to having my GF come down, I feel like I owe her a commitment of some sort room mates for a year two -. Essentially, I want to please them both (how co-dependent is that) while keeping my sanity their. looking for friends nowmore lateri asked if this was the start of something but it's not why can't i just let things happen? i was really because i started thinking about her again and i don't think that is what she has in mind so i asked her and now i am going to make a degree turn and . back on with my life . thoughts? anyone? bueller? verne? dating divorced women
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