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i need a beautiful woman tonight Waiter at the Lowry Sunday night Last night I went in for my weekly after work beer with a few of my friends. We sat in a booth, ordered some wine/cider/beers/iced tea.. I ended up paying for my friends iced tea and the cider on top of my beer. No big deal right? Tipped you, left an extra little tip for (you know why) and left. Lalala. Fast forward to this morning. "Hey? What's this $5 doing in my pocket? Where did it come from? I only had a $20 last night so how do I still have a $5? Waitaminute..FUCK!" Dude! That $5 was for you! I thought I had tucked it in the thing but it got stuck to my and put in my pocket! That means I only tipped you $1.50! No! Not cool!! I work in the service industry, I know the importance of tipping. You were so nice! Ugh. I feel awful. Like, really really awful. I want to give you this $5. It has your name on if. Actually, if I knew your name I'd just drop it off, but I don't. I hope you see this so 1. You know this was a mistake and I AM SO SORRY and 2. I can give you what's rightfully yours. I had a long week at work and was so exhausted and frazzled but I still can't believe I didn't notice the $5 wasn't there. :( Im so so sorry. - a vampire looking fo a lovely woman to bite
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For those that don't know about history Here is a condensed version: Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the. The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get to the beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups: 1. Liberals, and 2. Conservatives. Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed. Some men spent their days tracking and to B-B-Q at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement. Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly B-B-Q's and doing the sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement. Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became known as girlie-men. The most notorious of these is known today as Blues_Fag_! Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that conservatives provided. Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass. Iowa City girl cams
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