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You are least realize several issues you have. Knowing that you shouldn't conduct your relationship out of convenience is huge. Give yourself some credit for that because I know *so* fools who can't that that's what they are doing. Then they have the nerve to be dumbfounded when things blow up. I think you also realize you have an addictive personality type. In that when you are into something you are totally overboard into it. It's well known that a lot of people who stop one habit, start another. Maybe you just are making your way down the list in short order ; ) Once you've managed to learn some (not so great) things about yourself, the next step is to put your knowledge to good use and DO something about it. Keep your girlfriend at bay till you can get on your own two feet, don't let your weaknesses rule your life. It's difficult sometimes but I bet you are stronger than you know. Keep crackin' on the job and apartment fronts. Something is going to have to turn up at some point. Good luck. good hearted passionate and positive thinking individuals only
Look this is a cycle. Small suck energy like a vampire. She's gone from being just your wife, to being a mother to 4, with all the volunteer efforts that go with it. She barely has time to brush her teeth in the morning, and at this point, sex has fallen in importance to "GOTTA HAVE IT" to a non-unpleasant-but-necessary chore. She is probably aware that her body is reflecting pregnancies, but is perhaps a bit overwhelmed at the work needed in order to get back to square one. I can understand your for her to want to enjoy it, because by golly, sex is more fun when BOTH people are enjoying it. One thing you want to watch out for is to keep from insisting that it's no fun unless SHE'S having multiple orgasms it can incur 'performance anxiety'. That kind of pressure is counterproductive "oh, god, not only does he want sex, I also have to perform! Geeez!" It's not how YOU feel about her, it's how SHE feels about HERSELF. If she looks in the mirror and doesn't like what she sees, she might be feeling that "you're just saying that" in order to insure availability of sex. And, unfortunately, buying her the canvas and supplies probably just reminded her of all the things she doesn't have time for, now I'm sure she appreciate the thought, but in one sense, it was just a reminder of something she's not doing well, either. (Did I say any of this was rational? No, I didn't :-) But there it is.) As the get older and she's able to catch her breath now and then, she'll be able to focus on herself a little more. You sound like a decent guy. Please remember, though, that men and women don't approach sex the same way. Women need to be emotionally engaged first. Try giving her a romantic evening without the expectation of sex a "date night". Encourage her to take an evening off each week for an class. Send her off for a pedicure. Bring her flowers "just because." Are you sure you're giving her enough time to "warm up", so to speak, before sex? For example, sexy massages, where you show appreciate for her body, would be nice and if she falls asleep in the middle of the massage, that tells you something about her energy level, anyway. Sex cycles in a marriage you're at a low point now (and even then, you're STILL getting laid, so don't whine too much.) It come back. huge american cockI am getting the picture real clear, Thankyou for your reply. I it a lil more clear about her point of view. That was the issue I was having, that me bring with a guy was my choice based on my sexual orientation. I a lil more clear her point, in that she is str8 and I have no control at this point to make her choice. Yes your right, u hit everything correct! I should have thought this more thru on my actions, and realized how truly blessed I am for having a understanding as she is towards my needs. I really have been hard on myself, I realize what I did and it was stupid n selfish on my part! I just pray that she can forgive me. Thanks for being brutally honest, I am just terrified to loose the only woman that I have really loved and I shouldn't have taken her for granted. Thank you! older ladies
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