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yes i suppose im just comingout of the in shock phase and am trying to what others have done in this situation and how they have fared etc. i took my wows very seriously "to have and to.. till etc.. "and i shouldnt have. I grew up more conservative i guess and she was a bit more liberal i dont know. i keep trying to rationalize my actions and her actions and i keep coming back to the same odd point. they should have a wedding wow disclaimer sentnce (i have an affair.. blah blah). like i said i grew upwith the standard model of a family "as seen on tv" loving wife, working husband, etc etc. and thats how i was raised. Thats what i expected. Her family was even more conservative then mine. Im glad for this forum and id like to thank everyone who made comments. I appreciate the advice. It has helped me in my resolve on what i should do and maybe a few approaches. I know some have lived through this in one way or another. I dont wish it for anyone its not cool. youre also right "whatsname" about the "ball-less wimp" that thought did come to mind but, im ok with my masculinity. i am strong. I it as more a breakdown of of the trust that i perceived existed, or was led to exist. getting on-the-side is not me, i know some folks could do that easily and maybe itll help them. but then what. i it as becoming an "i did this" and "you did this" argument, would that work, would it level the field of resentment? maybe. i think its going to depend on whether she wants an open marriage or repair of our existing. i think its going to be along road regardless. i was hoping for an emotional train ride with wonderful stops, instead i got the roller coaster ride. One sad tidbit in all of this is that i found out about this in the middle of a family medical emergency. So it was a double emotianal roller coaster in one day. oh well i think just writing here and reading some comments has givenme some strength. take care everyone. 36460 cock need passy tonightI enter the room after a bath. I the bucket of ice with the new glass toy we just bought and the red candle sitting by the bed. You instruct me to lay on the bed and know whatever you have planned bring me pleasure. You light the candle. Expecting the wax, and even the ice, my mind goes into overdrive as you tell me to pass you the flogger. I look into your eyes and know over and above the words you are speaking to me that today I won’t be surprised if I feel the crop and your hand as well as the flogger before we are finished. The trickle of wax on my body focuses my mind on pain and pleasure. The heat turns to chill as you rub me with ice. Back to the hot wax dripping from my breasts down to my stomach. Next, you slide the glass dildo along my slit, spreading my lips and plunge it deep inside me. The torment of both sensations drives me wild. You tell me to turn over to my usual position, head right down, arms outstretched, ass high, not knowing what is to follow. My mind follows the sound of the movements behind me and the burning candle. I feel myself tense as I wait for whatever comes. Flogger and wax follow along with your hand, gently caressing my heated flesh with the ice cubes. The wax cooling with the ice, I feel the heat calming, but the stings of the flogging remain. You turn me over, and I in your eyes your pleasure. I try to calm my breathing as I hear the swish of the flogger as you move as I lay there, eyes now closed not wanting to know what happen next. Flogger? Wax? The silence lengthens and then… Thwack! On my breast. Then the other… and again and again until my moans fill the room as you dribble the wax over my nipples. My squirming body pulls away, yet not wanting to really. My eyes are still closed. I jump as you turn the ice to my pussy, rubbing the cube all over. The chill makes my mind move from my nipples and my need. Still concentrating on the chill, the heat of the wax trickling over my lips comes as a shock. My eyes open and I look up for the first time to you and the smile on your face as you concentrate on my body. My heart misses a beat as I the pleasure on your face. The suddenness of ice shocks me again and your fingers work my clit and enter me, bringing me to climax as you use the wax and ice. black woman
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