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I struggle with a gf sometimes who likes to fancy herself "the chivalrous one." This is for any number of reasons, but the main one is that it sometimes makes me feel like I am either being treated like a or like a delicate little teacup that she thinks break at any moment. The truth is that I LIKE doing things by myself, I LIKE a challenge, and I LIKE having things up in the air. I LIKE being an adult much more than I ever liked being a. And I most certainly am not a teacup. So although I realize that she is doing what she does because she loves me, it is also frustrating, because it takes away of my favorite things. Over time we have come to a good balance of things where she gets to be chivalrous sometimes or in specific ways, but she does not do every thing for me or defer to me always or INSIST that I order first off the menu EVERY TIME. Sometimes she even lets me hold the door. I do not think that the first scenario was her loving "too hard," as you put it, but simply channeling that into the wrong places, or expressing her in a way that was not appropriate for ME. The trick is to find a way to express it that works for both of you, not just one of you. party tonight in my hotelBut I'm kind of confused I'm not sure if I'm attracted to girls per se, but I feel more like I'm attracted to THIS one as an individual. I don't know. But anyway, I kept the emotions tucked away because the nature of our casual 'friendship' was never supposed to have emotions involved. But here's another thing that's messing with my head. She is engaged. And her fiancee doesn't know about the whole thing actually before all this, she told him that she wanted to try hooking up with a girl in general, and he shot it down saying that it would be cheating (which is understandable), and they never re-visited the issue. I feel guilty of being involved with someone who's attached because I'm usually a ethical person. So, I know that I need to remove myself from this whole situation, but I'm finding it difficult. I actually care about her now, and I know that if I get in too deep, it's just going to mess with me even more because she doesn't wanna get emotionally involved (neither did I but I can't help the way I feel now). Sometimes she tells me things like fights she's been having with her fiancee (has nothing to do with me or her bi-curiosity), and she'll tell me that she ended up crying, and it really breaks my heart to know that she felt sad. I find myself thinking about her all the time, even though I know I should get a hold of myself and back away from this situation. Sigh free adult personals
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