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He's not going to change for you, either, not in terms of basic character. The stuff you are describing are all basic building blocks to living in the world. Hygiene? Really? There's low-maintenace, women who wash their hair, let it air dry, and remember to throw on some chapstick. They tend to men who low-maintenace, unfussy women. Other women can't get ready in less than an hour to go to the mailbox and their men tend to appreciate the package. You are what you are. If you have some areas in your life that YOU want to improve because they are meaningful to YOU, then you should do so. Learn how to cook, learn how to care for a home efficiently, learn the charm of really listening to other people instead of always being the one doing the talking. These are life skills, not bait for a trap. NEVER remake yourself into something you think a would like, because every wants something different and half the time, they can't even tell you what they really want, because they'll "know it when they -/feel it." Your boyfriend sounds like he'd be better off looking for a good nanny than he would a wife. A mother and a father bring different things to parenting, if he thinks he's looking for a female version of himself, he's got a lot of learning to do about relationships. do you want tattoosthe effort shown by Poet and her family. She said they flew down, made sure someone was there with him in the ER, they did step up to the plate during a crisis. And there WAS a crisis, the almost died and has complications because of it. I don't know, but I think the reaction to take control comes from fear. Take control of something and you feel less afraid. There are also lines we all must draw, you speak of safety and I agree with someone stepping in when it comes to driving. That's an activity that puts OTHERS at risk. That's a far cry from someone perhaps not doing what's needed to protect themselves. And as far as compassion, I'm sorry you're dealing with it and I have real feelings for what Poet and her husband are dealing with. I struggled during those times, struggled hard. I spoke with my father's psychologist and when it was my stepdad's time it was just as hard. None of those choices and decisions came without consequences none. I had to decide to have my father go to a home designed to care for Huntington's patients away. Idaho doesn't have facilities and his daughter was there. When it was time for my stepfather to get permanent help(he was living in our home), he killed himself on the lawn but it was HIS choice. I do not fault him, I know what he was dealing with. I had to come to grips with feeling relief that I didn't have to clean his shit off the bathroom floor anymore. Wonder if there was some other option I could have offered but I know he didn't want more. It's not easy and heartache is part of the package. Like I said to Poet, I strongly suggest speaking with the care providers and friends. It's OK to be afraid, feel bad and confused. You're human. It's Ok to WANT to take control and give the you know you can. It takes a LOT of strength not to. to best for you and poet really do. sex dates
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