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I am in a new relationship (since -). It is going wonderfully in almost all respects. We are comfortable together, make each other laugh, our respective have met and get along well But (always a but!) in the last few weeks, it's become evident that he's having trouble sexually. He is extremely generous, and I am satisfied myself. We are also both equally experimental and enjoy each other in ways. But I can count on one hand the number of times he's been able to get and maintain an erection. He brought up last night that it's worrying him. I had noticed, certainly, but didn't want to pressure him or make him feel bad. There's an age difference (he's in his mid 40s) and I know from past experience that things do slow down for some men after a certain point. He's not in a position to be able to get checked out by a doctor right now (recently laid off). He says he's able to make things work on his own, but when he's around me it just doesn't happen. He says he's extremely happy in the relationship, and doesn't know what it is, other than ongoing performance anxiety (it's been this way since about our second time together). Has anyone had this happen and resolve itself somehow over time? He thinks it's nerves and/or emotional stress/psychological block. There are certainly plenty of things on the plate that could stress him out. He wants to work it out, and says he wants to be with me more than anything, and I believe him. crazy sex story want to sharer. Punishment is rigged an an attempt to change behavior. Works with some, doesn't with others. Of course you don't let a wander into traffic. That's where a parent would intervene because the logical consequences of the action are too severe. Maybe the logical consequence of that action is the can no longer be outside without the parent, or the must hold Mommy's hand, etc., etc. A random whack on the ass for wandering into traffic is like smacking a dog for coming back to you after it ran away. WTF is the message? Maybe the logical consequences of throwing your dinner plate down are no dinner. Or you have to clean up the mess before you can do anythign. Or depending on the age, maybe that is too harsh. Maybe Mom or Dad feeds you the dinner until you can be trutsed to care for your own plate. Logical consequences are scaleable to the age. Logical consequences (and never do for a what he can do for himself) actually gets to function as members of society much faster than anything. I'm not saying that parents never scold. People get pissed and upset and their tempers flare. That's kind of a logical consequence too. But to carve out "I'm going to yell at you as punishment" or "I'm going to beat your ass as punishment for this" is arbitrary and not very logical. And not very portable. Hmmm,,Mom yells when I do wrong, Dad whips my ass I wonder what this person does. And this person. And this person. cute girl
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