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if you'll do all those things without legal protection for yourself? He sounds broke and like he needs to get his shit together. A marriage ceremony can cost under $50. It's too expensive is the laaaaammest excuse ever. Trust me, it is not 'just a piece of paper'. Guys who use women and string them along often use that 'reason'. Oh, but I looove you, we don't need a piece of paper to prove we want to be together. Sound familiar? Marriage binds, and if he's worring this much about divorce before you are even married, you should probably move on. Ask yourself this, if you live together for say 5-10 years without getting married, is the breakup going to hurt less than a divorce? No, probably not. Neither of you is as financially protected as you would be with that 'piece of paper'. Plus you would not be able to make important medical decisions for him (as his gf) in an emergency. If you continue in this relationship, keep close friends, stay in touch with your family, keep your money totally seperate, keep your job/get a regular job, record which accounts purchases come from, have your own cell phone plan, have your own car. Keep in mind that both of you are probably going to be at different points in your life (and clearly have different goals even now), and that won't likely get better in time. Also, he sounds like he has terribly low self esteem. I worry about his little bit about having a and not wanting it to be like him. If you happen to have a with him (something fails), how do you think he would react? Are you thinking you'll wear him down on the family front? If you do, what kind of dad do you think he'll be? Think of who he is, not who you want him to be. don't ignore giant red flags. It's usually best to start a relationship with someone who not only has the same goals, but who is taking steps to reach those goals. sluty girls 95540I'm so glad he was willing to open up to you. You still need to create a safety net for yourself. Seriously. Sometimes people really and truly *want* to be better, to feel better, to do better but they can't. Be supportive but don't feel like it's your job to fix his depression. You could suggest taking walks together (fosters closeness, increases endorphins), volunteer together (doing something good for others, and boosting his resume), home projects like repairing walls and painting (not expensive but gives a serious sense of accomplishment), help him figure out ways to contribute in other ways (like taking over certain tasks at home) etc. By pushing to get out of the house together, you can help him when he is struggling to help himself. Strengthening your relationship should help his depression. Also consider changing your diet, taking a daily vitamin, and eating more veggies (sweet potatoes, spinach especially). Cut down on caffeine and alcohol. Try checking out the books '5 languages of -' and 'saving your marriage before it starts'. Yes, these were written by Christians, but my husband and I are Atheist and Agnostic and didn't find it to be hit you over the head based. These resources are inexpensive and really helped us understand one another better. With my ex, he didn't like himself very much and that turned into not liking me very much. I found myself practiy begging for sex and still being turned down. I tried to be 'perfect' as you mentioned in an earlier post, and became a doormat instead. I made his life such that he only had to come home eat, shower and sleep. He not be in the mood for sex, but perhaps yours would be open for mutual massages. Touch is soooo important for boosting well being. You both need it, though he not feel he is worthy. Find a friend group and get out more yourself. It's dangerous and unhealthy to make one person the center of your world. It puts far too much pressure on both people. Try dividing chores and tasks more evenly. don't do everything yourself, and create a budget you both can stick to. Ing lets you create as free saving accounts as you want, and a free checking account. is a good tool for tracking spending. Good luck to you both. With enough and work (both of you), you should be able to have a strong and relationship. married women wants for men
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