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Here's the thing: You can't just pluck one thing out of the air and pass judgement on your BF's entire financial management without giving us a little more background. If $ is a negligible amount to him, then you don't get to judge. IF he has savings, isn't in debt up to his eyeballs and is generally fairly responsible then he can spend his money any damn way he pleases. It's not your place to "approve" of what he spends his money on, in that case. Do I think $ is silly for a pair of casual sneakers for ANYONE? Sure. I wouldn't pay it, I'm not really a fashionista, but I don't begrudge anyone paying, IF THEY CAN AFFORD IT. (I have to admit, I once saw a pair of Louboutins that completely entranced me but couldn't bring myself to spend $ on a pair of shoes. That's MY choice. It certainly doesn't stop some people!) However, I did pay $ for soccer shoes for my one year he was playing on a club/travel team, and he wears a size 15 hard to find even regular shoes, much less well-fitting soccer shoes (and they HAVE to fit, the way those had to change direction on a dime.) He took care of them, kept 'em clean and even conditioned them occasionally. He appreciated them. Does your BF's appreciate the shoes? Or does he just toss 'em aside like last week's paper? Do a backcheck and make sure that your own financial and romantic history isn't coloring your judgement on your boyfriend's spending habits. You grew up poor. OK, yeah, a lot of people did. Growing up poor doesn't make you morally superior. (Neither does growing up, but that's another story.) I can why you might be nervous, especially if your ex was not fisy responsible. You say that he likes to spend money, but again DOES HE HAVE IT TO SPEND? If you and he co-mingle your finances, then you might want to consider taking a financial management class together, such as Ramsey's Financial Peace (take the 13-week seminar, it's more powerful than the on-line offerings, because it's harder to duck behind rationalizations. :-) It's a great program for getting partners on the same, financially, and helping them organize their financial goals in sensible ways. man seeks phone or online chat
Just remember the money is for the and you'll be doing your part, even if the system sucks and it doesn't all get to the. And file for modifications to have more time with the kid(s) as often as allowed. Have your ducks in a row when you do though. Comply with the agreement and document that you are complying. privat sex contact KendenupWell, I can you have decided that your date has to have all her ducks in a row before you add your ducks to her row. This attitude bite you in the butt in the future. As an example, myself, I have state employment, have a business at home doing alterations, and I also do home transcription. I have my finances in a row. I also don't have spare money because of minor debt, support issues, legal fees due to battle with the ex, and the need to get ahead in life, like paying for my car, budgeting for college, retirement investiment, life insurance, union dues, groceries. My home is paid for, but there is still maintenance costs, like needing roofing repairs, window replacement, plumbing surprises. I pay for everything on my home that requires more than a power drill, screw driver, and. I don't pay for a cell phone, I don't pay for cable tv (nor satellite). I don't have magazine subscriptions, movie subsriptions, music subscriptions. I actually spent some money (about $ for shoes and clothing) this year. Otherwise I make my own clothing and presents for family and friends. I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't do. I don't eat out more than once a week. I ride the bus to work, although I own a decent car (10 years old), where I still pay for my own maintenance, insurance, taxes/registration, and gasoline. I do pay for Internet although it is a tax deduction. I don't take vacations, although it would be nice to family again, since I haven't seen father, brother, or sisters in over 7 years. I don't even spend money for pets, since all I have is a gerbil. I don't get my hair cut, styled, and dyed professionally. I do get one hair cut per year. I don't get my nails done. Maybe I spent $50 a year in makeup. If you want a woman to be on the same playing field as you, then I suggest a woman in her 40s. Otherwise, you might consider being a bit more humble in your search. You might be blessed for now, but there are no guarantees that this last, and you discover yourself one day struggling to make ends meet. singles dating
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