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got a great head on your shoulders. Working on the issues that made him unhappy is a good route to find out why he cheated in the first place. BUT don't let him make excuses. The fact that he was unhappy gives him no right to cheat. It gives him the right to try and communicate this fact with you up to, and including the point of saying he wants to get divorced due to how unhappy he is/was. do you want a real man at homeopening up a discussion with your boyfriend is probably the best route. Start talking about all things sexual more often with him. Draw out his thoughts and feelings about bi sex, sex, lesbianism, polyamory, etc. Second, would you be comfortable if he were the one to bring this up? Would you be comfortable if, on learning that you wanted to a relationship with a woman, he would also want the same privilege to have another relationship? I came out to my wife under conditions similar to these. We had a great sex life, and both enjoyed talking about sex in general, and eventually the idea of opening up our marriage and each of us being able to have outside relationships developed. We discussed this over several weeks, (pillow talk), and covered a lot of the pros and cons, such as jealousy, time, privacy, etc. One night, she asked me if I had ever been with a, and I decided that I should be completely honest, and so I filled in all my past history of being with men. I had not previously been dishonest, I had never had to lie about it, but like you, just less forthcoming about it than I could have been. She had not asked, and I had not volunteered to tell. Surprisingly, she was turned on by the idea of my having sex with men, and much more accepting of my having sex with men than with other women. Good luck. dating community
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