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Normally, I'd say a lie detector test has no place in a relationship, and if you can't base the relationship on mutual trust and respect, then you don't have a relationship (or it's going to end, anyway). But you don't have the basis for a relationship, so this isn't a normal situation. Why? Because you've already demonstrated lying and cheating behavior (so the onus is on you to prove you're trustworthy), and your BF has some character trait (whatever it is) which caused him to be locked away from society. So . that being said, what have you got to lose? If you take the test and fail, or he fails, the relationship's probably over anyway. Trust cannot grow from this. But if you both pass, there is a *slight* you can clear the air and agree to start over. *BUT* I'd only do this ONCE with the clear understanding that it's a one-time event, never to be repeated. Tell him you feel it's embarrassing and disrespectful doesn't matter if he thinks it's no big deal, it IS a big deal to you and he should respect that. You'll do it once to clear the air, but no more. If you can't build mutual trust after that, then there's no anyway. At the FIRST sign of mistrust or lying behavior after the test, I'd advise either of you to pack bags and say goodbye. BTW I wonder about his reasons for asking you what questions you would ask. This is suspicious, as though he's been preparing his answers. I'd change the questions to come at the same issues from a different. And I have to ask How since he's been off parole? What was he convicted of? What significant changes has he made to ensure he's not tempted to repeat that behavior? girls for nsa sex Foggia
Wow this is an amazing forum. I was able to everyone's perspective from every. I really appreciate the feedback. As for the decision, i havent made it yet. From the funny one of medal of honor to the guilt trip of me not being a friend. Your all absolutely right in every way. This is a catch 22 from a mans point of view. I honestly do fear him, he is a trained killer and he's not all there mentally. He has his wife physiy and mentally.. this being the reason she just wanted someone to be there talk at first(Ladies can you blame her?? Sometimes we men are inconsiderate and just not there for you ladies). I convinced him to contact the VA programs for free advice and help if he needs any, He did but it didnt do much help. As for me my guilt has been hurting everyday . The first time she jumped/attacked me, i tried to stop it (Seriously)!!! He and I are good drinking buddys and on the weekends watch sports and kick back. I feel like i am more at fault at this and i should confront him. Sorry for taking up all of your time folks but thanks for the free advice. casual hang outlooking for open minded girlIf you've been having discussions in the past it appears obvious that what you have talked about hasn't exactly brought about what you had hoped to gain. Just because you have a new doesn't mean the message be heard or you are actually willing to listen to the answer. There's one key component required you know a person needs to want the change and no, 'he should want what I want' isn't an argument that get a result. It's part of that motivation thing there needs to be inertia and HE is the one who's going to have to provide it. A lot of this depends upon how YOU look at the issue and talk to him, you might want to think about how you've done it to this point before you bring on some new talk or the reaction could be oh, not THIS again, now she wants me to get a shot great. single black male
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