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just want a friend more exercise, a healthful diet, no drinking of alcohol, holding hands with you, putting one foot in front of the other, an acceptance that just getting by be okay for a little bit, meditation, in person support groups, forgiveness of self etc? You seem to be insisting that he be better right this minute. That isn't going to happen, and the pressure to be suddenly better is going to make him feel worse. Instead, have small goals like saying I'm proud of you for small things (like taking a shower..phrased as 'taking care of yourself right now'). Lower your expectations early on in this ordeal. Go to the doctors with him and stay in the loop about what his healthcare plan and outcomes are supposed to look like.
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