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So, I have spent a time thinking about and getting into the idea of more kinky, power-exchanging forms of sex, but outside of my imagination I have had very little experience beyond some simple spanking and I really really want to change that. I have tried ads here, but no one in my area seems interested or available, or maybe my inexperience shows. I've thought about going the old-fashioned route asking girls out, and then once we're comfortable seeing if she's interested but that just seems like an invitation to get a whole lot of smack talked about you around town by people who don't or won't understand (it's a small town), and it seems really amoral to make someone think they're about to get a relationship when I'm planning to ditch the second they say they don't want to be tied up. Outside of these two options, I'm not sure how to proceed. To my knowledge my city doesn't have any kind of clubs or scenes publicly dedicated to the pursuit, and I am under the impression that most alt-sex dating sites are total scams. So my question is: where/how do I find the people who like the things I like? Are there like secret signs that people paint on their doors that say they're interested? Is there a secret handshake? Do I just swallow my pride, sacrifice my reputation as "not a creep that your drunk boyfriends should harass" with the s**theads, and start asking every girl about it on the first date? The apparent inability to progress here is starting to damage my sanity. At this point, just about any sense of direction would help. For reference, I'm a male, mid 20's. I imagine that matters somehow. need a quick cardate bjshocked as you have a standing relationship/marriage? So mixing the $ with the kink I guess is an act of D/s or S/m ? Power exchange? I am having a hard time with understanding how it relates. I can only assume that it is a demonstrative omnipresent indication of his dominance over you, a reminder every time you use money? which is for me anyway something that happens daily unless I do not leave the property. I remember well what it feels like to be a slave to having to budget out of necessity,it did not feel good when there was nothing left and an embarrassing had to be made, That kind of situation made me very grateful for having a fall back but at the same time,I hated it. So I just wonder, does it manifest in a 'I need you I perish w/o you way' or perhaps in a 'He is taking care of me and loves me' way? I kinda don't get it but I know the concept cuts me to the quick and so I want to know. How does it, if at all enrich your kink? I know you cannot answer for him but I wonder about his perspective as well though I can more easily grasp that, or think I can. attractive women
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