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Sorry you had to go through this. I know the feeling I still get it sometimes if I'm at a party and DG is interacting with someone other than me or GA. Thankfully this doesn't happen very often I wish the feeling would go away, quite honestly, but it doesn't so I've had to try to learn to cope with it. Sometimes more successfully than others. I think your friend and the guy you are/were interested just didn't understand the strength of your feeling for the guy. It seems to me maybe you didn't understand it yourself, or you would have been able to convey to your friend in no uncertain terms that he was off limits. Perhaps other things about your situation made them think it wasn't crossing a boundary: I assume they both know you have a deep, ongoing relationship with someone? Perhaps they assumed your openness to a Poly lifestyle would permit them to play without you having a negative reaction to it? You are a smart, intuitive, incredibly articulate woman could it be that they assumed if you hadn't told either of them they were off-limits to each other, that they were fair game? It seems to me that if your friend is, as you say, one of your best friends, she wouldn't horn in on your "territory" if she thought it was "your" territory. She seems to have a genuine interest in the guy, from what you've said she has subsequently communicated to you do you think she is the type of person that would let herself go there if she truly thought she were stepping on your toes? FYI, I am by no means sure I'm reading this accurately just throwing out another theory among the others that have been offered previously. naughty ladies of ShepherdsvilleAs I it so far, we have roughly this exchange going on P1: Our play can hurt sometimes. P2. It hurt you, but it doesn't hurt me. Now shut the fuck up. That's one fucked up bdsm scene, in my opinion. And it's a sad statement about our (in)ability to act as participants, let alone experts, in consensual anything. Right now the best that can be said is that we're good at being a bad example. I we can bring this back to some kind of center. And while I'm motivated to write this because of the current discussion about how to deal with the more graphic content, it's actually been a problem here for longer than that, at least to me. There's been a really unpleasant thread of just out and out shitty behavior here for at least the past month. A good example is when someone wanders in and asks an innocent or even totally ignorant question, there seems to be almost a koi-like feeding frenzy to who can be the first and meanest to ridicule them with "that's not kinky" or "take it to the rofo" or "learn to use e." I don't know what's triggered this kind of behavior, but even before this discussion it was almost enough to have me simply stop participating here. There's bdsm, and then there's *just plain violence*, and we seem to be having real trouble recognizing where the boundary is. I we keep talking about it enough to be able to find it again and get back on the rght side of it.. Suggestions to follow later, if anyone wants them. wants for massage
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