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In order to seriously broach this subject, you're going to have to tell him about the monitoring software, and he is going to be royally pissed and try to make the argument about that. On the other hand, I can say that porn viewing, like any other addiction you can name (alcohol, gambling, shopping, phone sex, World of Warcraft, even web-surfing), if carried to excess, damages a marriage or LTR by taking time and energy away from the union: the more compulsive and the more time, the worse it gets. He needs to realize that his viewing is getting seriously compulsive and is not in his own best interests, let alone yours. Also, that it's not really any different in the run than alcoholism or what-have you, in its negative effect on his life and marriage. But how exactly you're going to bring that up tactfully without his hitting the roof and denying or defending the porn as harmless is a head-scratcher. Maybe e up one of those checklists for determining whether you're addicted to porn, and have him read it? Emphasize it's not about depriving him of enjoyment, even porn a few days a week, but about getting it back more into proportion to the rest of his life and enjoyments. anyone up for date night
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