Love You!past,present,future Sometimes I read a posting in this forum and I wonder if its you. I read things that sound like something the real you would say,not the person you pretend to be,and I imagine that it really is you. I guess I will never really know, but I cling to that slim chance. I know you well enough to know that I can't change your heart no matter how much I try,or wish for things to be different. It may very well be that I want you so bad because you are so unattainable. In spite of the reason,these emotions I have are real and they are permanent. I see your face when I close my eyes,and your name echoes in my mind when there is silence around me. Before this go-round with you we had never fully explored what we could really be together, but now I have seen it and felt it,and I know what both of us could have. Its madness knowing that its all right there for the taking, just out of reach,teasing us both. I can't predict the future and I won't pretend like I can. Who knows what would have happened in ten or twenty years. I can tell you that I was ready to put everything into being with you,I was going to invest myself completely into whatever it is that we had. I never wanted you to be anyone other than who you are,but I have to be who I am also. I keep hoping that one day we will meet in the middle,and we will finally make this fantasy into reality. Array Clarion horny affairlooking for bbc to and fuk Swf wanting to suck and get fucked by bbc. HMU if you want to have fun and cum! Can host. Israel sex girl com free cybersex chat
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Today i filed for divorce after 23 years, 11 months or marriage. High school sweethearts, now in our early 40's. I sex, so that wasn't the issue.. he didn't want it, and that wasn't the issue. He wanted someone yeah thats the issue. 5 years ago he fell in with someone he met through work. I caught him 1 yr after they got together, and he swore he would break it off, so I let him stay. 6 months after that, i caught him again. He swore it was only a phone.. 2 months later he told me he was unsure if he could ever get over her.. and went away for a weekend to "think" about it. He thought about it, and HE decided he wanted to date her while staying married to what his feelings were for her. I told him he was insane, and there was no way I was going to stick around for that. He broke it off with her again. That lasted maybe 2 more months. But I didn't catch him again until it had been almost exactly a year from first time. So like, 5 times that year.. that time i kicked him out. he broke it off with her again, and swore that was it, he was going to dedicate himself to working on our marriage. Of course by now, I have severe trust issues.. how the hell can i trust him after so times? But I tried.. I tried to let it go, and be everything he wanted, and shower him with and affection. Things seemed to be going okay, but last year, started downhill again. I tried to trust.. but then 4 months ago, he started treating me like crap again.. like he did when he loved someone.. so i finally forced myself to start checking up on him again. yeah, I caught him again. same woman, 2 years and 10 months after he moved back home. When i confronted him, he admitted they had actually been back together for 2 years. So.. he's basiy been cheating on my for the past 5 years So I was filing for divorce. He asked for legal separation, and I found out i can amend separation to divorce at any time so I did that, I don't want to fight, I just want this to end. My question is, how do I get over this I have poured myself into for almost 24 years? we have 2 grown, but I am by no means old, and I want a forever companion. I signed up for the forever, till death do us part package not this thing I have now. When is it safe to begin looking again, without burdening a new relationship with my baggage? adult dating in Wallasey
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