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on the back for being smarter than the average bear. Lots of guys WOULD let a new woman move in, take over the house and in the process, really mess up things with the and cause you a whole lotta heartache in the end. No, you're not asking too much. What you're probably experiencing is the fact that being "normal", secure guy, with a decent job and by the sound of it, a rationale mind, it has now has elevated you from your former status as 'just a dad' to somewhere closer to 'rockstar' status. If you're half decently good looking you wonder what the heck is going on cause the ex certainly never liked you like this. Thing is, at this point in life, what lots of women have found out is that they've dated the 'bad boys' all their lives and its got them absolutely nowhere or worse, its caused a ton of pain and hurt. So now, as a bona fide 'normal' guy you're suddenly hot property. Enjoy your newfound status, but yeah, you might have to tell a few of those overheated women that you want to take things slower. And even that is going to make you more desirable as the number of players out there is astounding. tonight dating friendsbeing supportive, dufus. You assumed that since she said there was nothing you could do for her, then you should leave her to deal with this by herself. Women don't usually think that way. MEN do, but not women. Instead, women usually gravitate *towards* each other (or to understanding SOs) for emotional support; not close themselves off to be alone. Rule #1: DO NOT attempt to tell her what she should do to feel better. You're not Mr. Fixit; she doesn't want you to find solutions for her problems. She wants you to hold her hand, listen to her woes, let her cry on your shoulder, and hold her close. That's all. Rule #2: DO NOT blow off her emotions as unimportant, unrealistic, or counter-productive. Just let her vent, cry, complain, or bitch; while you stay out of the line of fire. Once she's vented, she'll calm down and feel better. Rule #3: Understand that "no, there's nothing you can do for me" means this: no, you're not a doctor and you can't fix this cancer for me. But I'm, and I don't want you to know how I am; so I'm going to tell you that you can't help, while at the same time I *expect* and *need* you to stand ready to catch me when it becomes too much to handle by myself. So yes, there's nothing you can do FOR me. But there's a whole lot you can do to make me feel better while I go through this by myself. Make sense? Send her flowers, make homemade goofy cards to tell her you're thinking of her, fix her favorite dinner, distract her with and other activities, buy her a bear, mow her lawn or rotate her tires for her, or text her for no reason other than to say I you or hear her voice, ask how she's feeling today, stuff like that. dating a friend
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