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upset about me saying this, but a lot of the safe- and reference things are just what you are saying ways to expedite things when, maybe, just maybe, it's the attempt to rush in or go fast or skip steps, that is exactly the thing that people, especially beginners should be wary of doing. I have a pseudo-theory about this. You might like it even if it can't be proven. The theory goes that people become involved with BDSM/kink and believe they have found the holy grail or its equivalent. They get this huge burst of energy and excitement. They find whole parts of themselves they have denied. It is amazing. When people make this discovery, the first impulse they have is to make it all happen as much as possible. Moreover, whenever they find someone esle with whom they have these amazing experiences, they are led to think that there is a profound connection between them based on their sharing together in the holy experience of BDSM. All this is deceptive. According to the pseudo-theory, BDSM is actually a kind of holy thing, but it isn't the holy thing that everyone first thinks it is. It isn't holy enough to create a lasting bond for more than a few sessions. The energy crashes when you have a bad scene. And your mom still needs you to help her clean out the garage, while that report is due on Monday. According to the pseudo-theory, people mistake the energy of Kink as a balm of existence. Nothing can be this, though. It adds to existence, and does so in unusual ways, that are more about the way one finds oneself running out to the local drive to help flood victims, than that initial buzz that came with discovering its cool to be tied up, gaged and sodomized. I'm really glad you appreciated what I wrote. I almost didn't post it. Thank you, my sub-sister! free girls to fuck New HavenFew people under the age of 50 are prepared for it, or for the death of a loved one. Besides death, any life crisis is *incredibly* emotional and often affects your well-being and future. Most of us go through several of those in a lifetime it's not so rare at all. The existence or not of a marriage certificate does not change the nature of your emotional relationship with your SO. In this sense, it *is* just a piece of paper. As as life goes merrily along without injury or illness, death, divorce, bankruptcy, homelessness, etc. then the piece of paper doesn't matter. Life is grand. The true value of that piece of paper is only realized at those critical times when it is necessary to protect legal rights (or to cripple you when it gets in the way of splitting up). Wouldn't it be grand if life would just roll along the way we want it to, the way we planned it? We could flip the bird at these stupid legal and political intitutions which complicate matters. But when a crisis strikes, it's at those times you'll DEPEND on those legal institutions to protect your own rights and those of your spouse. That's when the paper matters. It matters a LOT. It's not that money matters most to me But it does matter some, when I've spent much of my life pouring my dreams, effort and money into a life which I share with my spouse, and he likewise with me. Much can be pre-arranged with wills, jointly held assets, etc. But some cannot as observer pointed out, pensions and death benefits. Those go only to the legal spouse; or if no spouse, they go to no one at all. It's more about security and protecting the life we've built together, so that if either of us dies, the other can on with as little struggle as possible. If we were not married and I had no rights to his Social Security or pension, I'd survive. I'd make my own way, true. I did before we met. But this is not the future we hoped for and built together. The marriage certificate helps to protect that. seeking for romance
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