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milf s and cougars needed 12 step programs aren't for everyone. Mentioning it once is fine, but maybe you should walk away from this one. As I understand it, people come to 12-step programs when and if they want and need to. They can be nudged, sure but as good as I think your motivation is, proselytizing can be counterproductive. This person is obviously in pain and using self-destructive behavior to kill it but I doubt that continuing to present 12-step programs to her as a solution isn't going to do anything but make her react. Plus, the OP seems to think she has this particular tiger by the tail, and nothing anyone says seems to convince her otherwise.
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