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A rape *fantasy* is a whole nother ball of wax. It is not a rape. It plays right at the edge of safety, I think. That she could let him get this close, be this, be this forceful, and still at the end still be safe (and for, still loved and cared for and protected). Like sky diving. REALLY falling out of an airplane is fatal. Sky diving is way to get the same rush without dying. Wrestling and boxing aren't actual fights to the death. And so on. Women get a lot of "Good girls don't" as we're growing up. A "nice" woman doesn't want sex, or at least, doesn't want it with anyone except her husband, after marriage, and then mostly just to have. even those of us who had no religious upbringing and whose parents never said anything like that the message is still "out there." So I think a lot of women do feel some degree of "I want this, but I shouldn't." One way to get beyond that "shouldn't" is to be coerced. Then you do it, but it's not your fault because you didn't choose it. do need a place to crash
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