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So my frustration continues to build. When I met him, he was in his late 30's and told me he was a virgin, he had had only 2 short relationships and never went all the way with either of them. He said this was due to religious beliefs. At the time we met I was 35 and he was 39. We have been married now 8 years, together 9 years. At 35 I had only one real serious term relationship, and a few short terms ones, and had dated a lot. I had always loved sex and considered it the most important part of any relationship. But at 35, I really wanted to get married and have a family. I felt like I kept meeting wrose and worse type guys in my 30's, than I had in my 20's. So I don't know, I guess I can say I was getting desperate. I am glad I stayed with him, even though in the beginning it was very aparent he would never really be that sexual. I am glad because we got married and had a almost immedietly, and my is the best most beautiful thing in my life. But now, fast forward 9 years later, I am depressed. I am 44, not in my 80's! I want to have sex and feel this gloomy feeling, like unless I try hard to initiate, and do all the work, then it wont happen. When we do have sex, its mostly me trying hard to get him off. He has never even tried to give me an orgasm. He once said it takes me too. He maybe has gone down on me less than 10 times in 9 years. WHat is good about him, is he is very loyal, I know he does not cheat, he is always home when not at work, and his only "thing" he likes to do is fantasy football. He much goes along with any idea for what to do, but I usually have to make any and all plans, but he'll go along with them. Regarding sex, in the beginning we would fight over it, and I would wonder if he was (turns out no) I wonder if he just has the worlds lowest sex drive. He claims to be tired .but even when he was unemployed for a couple years, the sex just never happened (unless I tried to get him started). His excuses to me have been too tired that he is shy and does not like initiating (shy after all these years of marriage?) and also doesn't want to do it because I've upset him in some way. SO through the years I've tried different things. looking for sex with no stringsYou and I should be used to being ignored by now! I find it hilarious the way the other 60% of guys "bullshit" when we dare them shallow and superficial. This is our reality though. We are fat and in our sub-culture, mainstream culture for that matter, fat and ugly are interchangeable adjectives. Guess what!? We are the only one's who can do a damn thing about it! I prefer the Shangri-La diet. It's simple. I use a tablespoon of oil when I wake up in the morning and wash it down with a tall glass of cold water. NO FLAVOR WITHIN 30 MINUTES OF THE OIL! No smoking, no brushing teeth, no chewing gum, nothing with any flavor. The point of the diet is to disassociate calories from flavor. I do the same thing around lunchtime and then have a nice dinner when I get home. "This technique is great for fattening up the wallet too since groceries are soooo much cheaper than fast food!" The number one reason any diet has failed me in the past is that I'm hungry ALL the time. Without the association between calories and flavor my doesn't know what to make me crave. As such I'm not hungry which makes sticking to a diet much easier! Every person is different this diet works for me "down 10 lbs already and 70 to go". Grab the book from your local library or order it online. don't starve. Your body breaks down muscle when you starve including your heart! I try to keep it to calories a day. Find a calorie calculator online and find a good daily intake for your DESIRED weight. Your current weight give you the calories you need to stay at that weight. Know it is GOING TO TAKE TIME!!! I'm looking at 70 lbs over the next 6 months to a year. If you lose weight too quickly, you find it with interest just as fast! You are also going to look worse losing weight than you do right now. Without your fat to hold out your skin it sag. I kinda like it cause my drooping foreskin makes my look bigger and I've always been a grower instead of a shower. But that's besides the point. Im sorry my fat brother but I've gotta agree with these skinny bitches. Either up, get active and diet, or quit your bitching! Stay fabulous bitches! american sex woman
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