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Having your friends spy on him? Come on now. If its so bad where you can't even trust him and you have to have your friends help you spy on him, then now that you've dumped him just move on. don't cry about it, feel happy you're not pulling your hair out in stress wondering every two seconds what he's doing now. I never get why women want to be with men like that or why they men that drive them nuts like that. professional man looking for a special man
Look He was unfaithful in nonperformance for YEARS. Somehow he get away with that somehow no one that as an issue. You were only a little foolish in telling him but fair enough at least it got him to go for the Viagra. Of COURSE you would prefer to have sex with your husband. No surprise there. Most of us would. Oddly guys get away with nonperformance suggest you just do what ya gotta do but keep it safe and discreet. If you can, it help your sanity more so to rework the agreement formally between you reality is that he has no intentions of fulfilling his part of the marital contract to have sex or maybe ability that could easily be too. He actually be relieved. Do whatever you do with compassion you know he's not evil or terrible but with the term porn thing, it would take a whole lot to turn the mind patterns and physical reaction patterns to turn around. does have sex therapists you can try. Guys don't tend to go for it but hey maybe. If it takes a lover, just do it and heaven forbid you actually say anything anywhere 'coz gotta tell ya you're not going to get a lot of support. Just be discreet, safe and kind. Women have been making this bargain for thousands of years as have men. 70% of marriages have had at least one affair do the math. It isn't all men and it isn't all women and there are lots and lots of reasons. Marriages have been subsidized by lots of things forever, family, community property, career, sports, fame, lots of things. If that does go against your grain, get yourself over to Good Vibrations or Romantasy and pick up something truly choice. If you're going to survive, as well do it with some pleasure somewhere. Even if it is within 2 square inches. No you should not have to be celibate for the next 30 years. Funny how no one would tolerate a spouse witholding food, money, shelter, healthcare .but somehow sex is this one off exception where abandonment is supposed to be ok. Ah well. Good luck. girl to get fucked by guysThere are factors to consider: 1. How rentable units exist in the building? If it has 6 or more units then it must be registered as a rentable apartment with HPD and it is regulated under Rent Regulation Guidelines. Which means that heat and hot-water ARE included in the rent. I friggen HATE NY Realtors who, when asked about utilities answer, "Oh, heat and hot water are included " No sh*t, Sherlock, it's an 18-unit apartment building! If the building has less than 6 units, well, in that case the Owner can choose to your gas and electric utilities or not Hey, some Owners have cable already installed for ya not too, though 2. Is it a new apartment (say from a gut-rennovation)? Because if it has been rented before, then the Owner (and/or Real Estate Rep) ought to have SOME idea of how much the utilities are If this is the first time your (new) unit is being rented (and there are NOT a lot of 3-level units in NYC), then yous-guys are gonna be the utility "guinea pigs" so to speak. 3. How frugal (and/or eco-conscious and/or romantic) are you and your roommates? Do yous turn lights off when not in the room? Enjoy frequent candle-lit dinners? LOL 4. What are your schedules like? All day-jobbers probably means "lights out" at night but combo day- night-jobbers means lights probably be needed at all times 5a. How are the windows? If new, then they probably keep the heat in during and the cool air-conditioned air in during. But if the windows suck, (say old, industrial loft-style windows) then your electric be high because of the use of heaters and having to turn the AC up to maximum. 5b. How handy are you with weather-stripping? Cuz if you weather strip well-enough you might over-come some of those suckie-window issues, that is, if you have such issues 6. Welcome to the wonderful world of renting in NYC. I'm not sure average New Yorker is quite THAT efficient as to know specifiy what they pay to heat/cool/light/cook in their apartment per square foot. Truth is Welcome to New York! college dating sites
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