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first let me tell you I am a woman.. and I disagree with all the other posts. First thing I would do is talk to a lawyer. You have been taking care of your step a time and might now be responsible for them financially. I don't think it is fair you work 2 jobs to support the second family, life is too short for that. I guess the bottom line is: do you your wife? If yes, does she work? I would expect her to. Then I would tell her we have to get the father of these to step up to the plate and go after CS. If she does both those things, that all you can do. If you don't her, then yea, I would leave. It's not fair to her or to the to you two in a loveless marriage. They grow up and you two are their role models for what a marriage is. Far as the other woman, she really isn't the issue. That is like putting the bandaid on the wound. Your issues should be dealt with first before involving her. And that is my opinion, right or wrong, thats how I think. And if you are reading this and disagree, thats fine, but arguing or trying to belittle me, won't change my mind. kiero verga en MauiReposting. Hoping for more responses in this forum. Briefly, I have a friend/co-worker whose partner/fiance died from suicide. She asked for my help when he died, as she knew that my father died by gunshot wound two years earlier. She also stated that she didn't have family support, and she didn't, they didn't even come in for the funeral. I said I would be there and talked to her a few times about it in the beginning. Six months later, I am now engaged and was told by my fiance and pastor to give up all opposite friendships. Recently she came to me and asked me about flashbacks and hallucinations and I told her that I was not allowed to talk to her, because of what my pastor and fiance told me to do. I know it was bad timing, but I was told not to talk to any other women. Now the friend is deeply hurt and feels abandoned. I told her I was sorry she felt that way. She has asked me how I could say I would be there and now am not. I told her I cared about her, but that I would only be able to say "Hi". We work in the same building and the atomosphere is beyond tense and we both avoid each other completely. I feel guilty that I told her I wuld be there, but also want to do what my fiance and pastor say is right. This doesn't feel right to me. I've never broken my promises before, but this is going to be my third marriage and I don't want it to fall apart. I've made promises to both of them and I didn't tell my fiance about my friend asking me for help. But the guilt is taking it's toll on me and my pastor is adamant about the opposite friend thing. I can't find a thing that says I can't have opposite sex friends in the Bible. It does say to take care of widows and to not make promises you can't keep, but now I'm told not to? I have been a good all of my life. I had intended on keeping that promise I made, but now I can't. Totally conflicted here. casual relationships
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