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ya actually when I was hanging out with some of my friends, a guy I had never met asked me if I was a lesbian because he apparently wanted to hook me up with his lesbian bff (which I later found out is tied to another one of my lesbian friends, what a small community) Ya I have been doing lots of research about the lesbian world, asking questions to my friends, reading autostraddle, etc. I don't this as experimenting as much as more validating my feelings. The thing is with girls, everyone always finds other women attractive so that's not an indication of being a lesbian or not and lesbian being a trend these days, it's even more confusing to spot who's who. Honestly, if it were more accepted, I think everybody would be able to admit they fall somewhere in between the Kinsey scale. But with guys and girls alike, I can find them attractive physiy but I don't necessarily imagine myself with them. I'm not that sexual I guess in that sense, I need to have some sort of emotional and intellectual connection to them in order to get to another level. I never fell in with friends and something just happen they were always a romantic interest and that's all. So now this leads me to feel that I can be with a woman, I just never gave it serious thought because of societal norms. TBH, I was way more tomboy before than now (like baggy clothes and I skateboarded) so I find it surprising that people didn't me as a lesbian before, unless they did and just never said anything. Anyway, tangent just looking for casual companionshipEver ponder the psychology behind both acts? Some women oral sex as very intimate, and conversely anal sex can feel almost detached and more carnal. It is a hard thing to describe but for some there is an intense vulnerability with receiving oral sex. Allowing someone to have complete control over your orgasm, with their mouth, while you enjoy it that's hard for some women because they actually cum from that. There are women that cannot climax from penetrative sex so for them oral is a very intimate and vulnerable spot because they are actually having an orgasm. But I can't believe you are running into women that want anal over oral. Because the same can be said for anal. But maybe they don't want to look at you during sex? And what? Their bar on? Do you mean bra? Are you also running into women who want to keep their bra on during sex? I tell ya bub, you are hitting the exceptions. You have control over the bra situation ya know I mean maybe they aren't taking their bras off because you are clumsy with breast play? Maybe you manhandle their tits so they have decided to leave the bra on? Jeez there is a whole level of arousal and intimacy you are missing out on if the bra is on during sex. so what you have said really could sound like a not-so-stellar indicator of your clumsiness with intimacy the women you are with would rather face away from you, take it in the ass and keep their bra on dating conversation
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